BRIEF MENTION.

Marlborough Express, Volume XXXV, Issue 168, 23 July 1901, Page 3

BRIEF MENTION.

The beautiful meteor of yesterday morning was seen in Wellington.

Meteors aye magnificent objects in' their way, but afford no excuse \ for staying oat late.

•Twelve thousand million copies of newspapers, the world's total output, consume 1760 million pounds of paper.

All British newspapers combined had a circulation of 60,000 in 1801. Their present circulation is estimated at 8| millions a day.

"It really requires much work to edccate the members of the Education Boards "—Mr Fisher, during the compulsory drill debate.

Has not Captain Russell worn the late Queen's uniform? If so, why should he object to Mr Seddon or Sir Joseph Ward wearing the King's ?— Napier Telegraph,

A "United South Africa " has made a start. Already daughters of Boer officers are becoming British by marriage with English officers.

The crow is said to fly at the rate of 25 miles an hour. If it can keep up this speed for- any length of time, it can give any train from Perth to_ Bunluiry an hour's start and a beating.— Perth Daily News.

" Sir J. M'Kenzie, K.C.M.G., Mayor of Wellington," is the address on an envelope which has reached the Wellington Corporation ' offices from the Premier of West Australia. .

Free Lance considers that Arbor Day should be succeeded by Arbor Night. Most of the newly planted trees disappear before morning. Why are brewers and .publicans the best diamond producers ? Because they belong to de heer company. : : A young lady says that for the same reason they make the best under takers. Collapse! The day before a Scottish Reservist left iov the Capo he handed his wife si .ticket. "What is this?" asked his wife. "It's my insurance ticket for £100. If I am killed you'll get the money." " Na, na, keep your ticket. My 1 tick's nae sac quid as that," was 'the startling reply. An old Maori chief named Daniel, residing at Matapihi, near Tauranga, died the other day, being about 93 years of age. He was present at the last tribal fight which, tojok place at Mount Monganui, and later acted as guide to the British troops at Gato Pa and Te Rariga figuta,. receiving* a medal and pension for his services. ■■' The question of insisting on local bodies adapting a uniform system of bookkeeping might, says the Premier, b3 considered when the Counties Bill is befoi-e the House. Whitebait has already made their appearance iv the Bui lor River. Oißoe. Stranger (e')toi-ing): "Is the clerk iv?": Manager: "No." Stranger: " Gone for a rest?" Manager (sadly): " No, gone to avoid arrest." ! . Ceylon pays £9500 a year towards British military expenditure; Mauritius, : £20,500 ; Hongkong, £44,000 ; Malta, £5000; Nat*l, £4000. One of the returned troopers states that One Now Zealand sheep is equal to two and a-half Transvaal sheep from a culinary poirt of view. The same proportion 13 alleged in regard to cattle. ..«••. Affable Aristocrat: "Thefactis, my name is not Gibson. You see, I'm travelling incog. There's my card." Mr Tappings: "Glad to hear it. I'm travelling in pickles. Here's mine." A sanitary Testament for use in the administration of oaths ha»been put on the market. It is bound with white celluloid, instead of leather, and it can therefore be washed and disinfected from time to time. The tramp appears to be disappearing. ; In Norfolk 29,037 casuals were relieved in the different unions in 1897. In the following year this dropped to 24,128 ; in 1899 it went down to 15,095 ; and last year it was only 9732. In Jeopardy.—Amateur Gardener (to goat fancying neighbor): "Hi, Madam! One of your confounded pets has got into my garden, and is eating my bedding - plants!" Neighbor: "Good gracious! I trust that they are not poisonous!" King Edward has authorised these changes in evening dress at Court functions: — Silk stockings, velvet knee - breeches, velvet clawhammer coat, black satin waist-coat, shoes, and buckles. This, he thinks, is needful in order to distinguish guests from waiters. Ex-President Kruger is stated to have only once tasted alcohol. At Bloomfontoin, after the signing of the alliance between the Transvaal and the Free State, he tossed off a bumper of champagne and put the glass down with a face of disgust. In Duncdin the other day Mr W. Hutchison said that he had been informed that our men gambled in South »" Me a and at sea. It is said that two /, I visitors had each 300 soys. in l• i v i ns won J aQd ia^ a" whale" of ™ AusfcrMian ratttMW* recently with £3000 of *?U* he skinned his dupes. James M'Neill Whistle* was once painting a portrait of a distinguished novelist, who was extremely .eiaver, but also extremely ill-favored. \\ ben the portrait was finished the sitter did not seem satisfied with it. •: "You don't seem to like it," Whistlor said. The sitter confessed that he did not, and said, in self-justifi-cation : " You must admit that it ia a bad work of art." " Yes," Whistler replied; "but I think you must admit that you are a bad work of nature."