Under Currents

Waikato Times, Volume 108, Issue 18165, 1 November 1930, Page 6

Under Currents

HERE, THERE & EVERYWHERE.

(By “ Gleaner.”) FORMOSA. More trouble for Japan in Formosa. Her attempts to subjugate the aboriginals there have involved the expenditure of a colossal sum of money without the compensation of success. That wisest of all men, the old-fashioned Chinese, realised when the island belonged to his country the futility of force and the advantages of peaceful penetration. Chinese labourers were encouraged, and sometimes forced ' to marry aboriginal women with a result that a new race, Chinese in alegiance, was springing up. It was a slow process, much too slow' for the Japanese, but it would have won out in the long run, as each year saw more territory come quietly under China’s jurisdiction.

AUTUMN MANOEUVRES. Most of their good points the Japanese took from the Chinese, but they did not take patience. Having walked over a weak Chinese and half-starved Russian army the Japanese were under the impression that operations against the aboriginals of Formosa would provide something in the nature of autumn manoeuvres for their troops. Never did a nation make a sorrier mistake. Safe in their sylvan mountain fastnesses the natives merely laughed at the efforts of the Japanese. Realising that discretion was the better part of valour the Nipponese called a halt and penned the erstwhile despised ones in by the construction of a barbed wire' fence charged with electricity. * * * * A GRISLY BEDROOM. Every so often friend abo gets a bit festive, descends on a military outpost knd secures a few Japanese heads for his children. The skulls of those taken in battle are generally kept in one building and here the male youth of the tribe sleep. It is thought that in so doing strength and valour will accrue unto them. **■ * * WOMEN CHIEFS. These aboriginals are divided into so many independent units, that some of the septs consist of only a handful of people. Some of the chiefs are women. Their languages are as varied as their septs, but all in a measure akin.to Malay, from which stockthe people are believed to have sprung. * * * * FORMOSA AND FILMS. Sugar is a very important export of the island, but camphor is the one that goes to every corner of the globe as it is used in the manufacture of cinematograph films; The camphor trees grow on the dangerous borderland and in the territory of the aboriginal. Bearing this in mind next time one tires of watching a puerile American film one has only to use a little imagination to think of sterner things. , One can visualise the lonely camphor gatherer going about his work apprehensively in the knowledge that nearby in the forest is an abo waiting a chance to slice off his head. So whether, we enjoy a film or not we can give a thought to that poor devil out in Formosa risking his life so that we may be entertained. Not that he s thinking about us, lie’s probably never seen or even heard of films, but nevertheless he contributes, however unwittingly, to the pleasures of some. As far as “ Gleaner’s ” concerned after sitting in agony watching the average film he generally arrives at the conclusion that the. camphor gatherer deserves all that’? coming to him for aiding in the perpetration of such caricatures on human life. We'll let it go at that. * # * » “NON-STOP MIDGET GOLF.” Extracts from news : “ Matthews was received on his arrival by the Mavor of Darwin and the Government resident, Colonel Waddell . . • The airman brought a bottle of wine from the Governor of Bima to the Governor of Darwin. His first remark was; 1 i’m jolly glad to see you folk. I have had a lot of bad luck- My experience shows that fast air service between England and Australia is quite feasible ... On landing Kingsford Smith asked for a cigarette. He was offered whiskey and soda but declined, saying he preferred travelling on water. The airman was wearing plus fours and also a gold lucky elephant on one wrist.” Mention of the exploits of the three Intrepid airmen who flew from England to Australia reminds me of the equally daring feats of my cousin Eustace Niblick, who made the first non-stop, all-weather, round of the new Slopville midget golf course, writes “Dm:te Joe.” It will be remembered that Eustace, using a variety of clubs, ranging from a hairbrush to a vacuumcleaner, actually completed the course in 14 weeks 10 days 6 minutes the previous record being that of Alphonse Cleek, whose ball became stuck in the stove-pipe joint near the 14th. green. Eustace hopped off from the fltst tee on October 9 and struck it rough at the disused tyre, where he was badlv bunkered. With matchless British courage and determination, he braved the elements and holed out five times in under 20— only 15 strokes above bogey. Trouble with the rabbitSS door at the 12th. necessitated a forced landing, but a magnificent chip-shot saw him again . on his triumphant journey. On arrival, after skilfully negotiating the dangerous volcano at the 18th., Eustace was received by the Mayor of Shpville and the borough caretaker. The hero had with him a bottle of embrocation from the Governor of Muddleton to the Governor of Slopville- His first remark was: “Curse these suspenders, they pinched all the way. When the storm of applause had subsided Eustace said he had last seen Augustus O’Ell, another challenger of Cleek’s record, using his foot to hole out at the 6th. He Sought the Lilliputian Golf Ministry should investigate the propriety of

th % v experience,” Eustace told a reporter" of . the Slopville Shriek, “ shows that fast, midget golf is feasible ” On landing, the great midgeteei asked for an orange and a pinch o snuff. He was offered methylated sn'rits but declined, saying he preferred stewed prunes, and grape nuts. Eustace was wearing a dinner jacketnviama trousers ensemble wi h purple beret and also a bronze lucky rhinoceros on one ankle. He anounced his intention of returning to the- first tee with a new set of clubs including a lam spoon, taking the washing, board ( x o ri castle dog kennel route.