The Westport Times. SATURDAY, OCTOBER 23, 1869.

Westport Times, Volume III, Issue 571, 23 October 1869, Page 2

The Westport Times. SATURDAY, OCTOBER 23, 1869.

Mb. George Augustus Sala has given to the world, and without much benefit to the world, a book bearing the name of " Breakfast in Bed." It achieves what it, perhaps, only pretends to do—it perpetuates in print the occasionally brilliant and the occasionally drivelling ideas of a man who " lies long a-bed," and who assists his imagination ere while by a cup of coffee or a gin-cocktail. With or without those aids, probably most people have, by lying long a-bed, achieved the drivel without attaining the brilliancy of Mr Sal?. We do not doubt that they have also arrived at a uniform conclusion—that it is a most pernicious habit, contrary to the principles of true hygiene, as it is also contrary to the ' sentiments of that most respectable man and poet, Dr Watts. To breakfast in bed is, however, a very venial offence against the laws of Nature compared with converting the " curtained alcove " into the theatre of one's daily work or study. Exception may be made in the case of a man who cau write such excellent poetry as the author of " The Seasons," or in the case of the half-frozen Eussian peasant. But for a man of ordinary abilities, in ordinary health, and in ordinary countries, excuse there is none. Fortunately the practice is not a prevalent one. Her Majesty, from whom, in these dominions, all fashion radiates, has not yet undertaken the government of her empire from—her bed. At least we are as yet unadvised of any radical change, equivalent to that, in the construction of the throne. The judges of the land, it is true, may occasionally sit upon a wool-sack, and do with impunity nod; but, the Courts of Law, with all their changes, have always maintained the pristine structure, the bench, in preference to a bed. The clergy adhere to their pulpits—as long as they can ; and, as a snuggery, prefer a bishopric. The generals of our armies often do their work in the saddle; when they seek a bed it is one of glory—to die, or one of straw—to sleep. So might we illustrate, ad infinitum, the position which, among most civilized communities, the bed occupies as a social institution.

It has been reserved for New Zealand to initiate an innovation; and the innovation has appropriately I eon made in a place called " Sleepy Hollow." Of the habits of the inhabitants there quaint stories have long been told, but they have, as a rule, been received as "travellers' tales." "We have have now, however, evidence from an authentic source corroborative of the extent to which the bed is there appreciated or abused. AVe have it from the Thief Magistrate himself. lie himself is a convert to the prevailing custom whether he is so to the extent of breakfasting in bed, or of inspiring himself with coffee or cocktails, wo cannot say, but we hope not. Beginning with brilliancy, a course of cocktails mightend—as Mr George Augustus Sala often does—in drivel. For the present he contents himself with carrying out —from a situation of " calm repose " between the sheets—his oflicial duties as Superintendent of the Province. Here is his own evidence on the subject:—

A fficat part of the duties of the Superintendent were done by him in led —between five and eight in the morning—in reading documents and thinking cverthem. The Superintendent's duty was to think, in order to direet, not to do merely the duty of a chief clerk. And as it is the Superintendent's duty to think, it is the Superintendent's pleasure to think—if anywhere—in bed. It is a pleasing fiction on the part of the electors that the Superintendent is chosen to a chair. The Superintendent, in this instance, prefers the more pleasing reality—a bedstead. For robes he substitutes " Kings may be blest," but he remembers also that " uneasy lies the head that wears a crown." He asks no more than to be made a Superintendent, and have leave to wear a night-cap. Purple and fine linen may be the taste of As a simple Superintendent, he prefers an opossum nig. To drive the goose-quill may be the duty of clerks. For a chief of clerks the appropriate article is swandown. Swathed in swan-down he thinks, and thinks, and has thought himself into thinking, as we all think, that, for a feather-bed policy, Nelson is the natural centre, and that the proper place for its Superintendent is that " sleepy hollow " —the centre of [ the bed.

" Sleep, Richmond ; sleep in peace, and wake in joy." A fitting peroration this might have been to Mr Curtis's address on Monday last to the seventy bucolics who assembled to hear him in the Richmond " Agricultural Hall." Richmond's rural sleep had been disturbed. That horrid man, Mr Gibbs, had said that the poor Province was to be saddled with £4OOO or £SOOO as the preliminary cost of a railway scheme which had already come to nought. Was it really so ? quotk Richmond. Nay, quoth Mr Curtis ; 'twas a fib of Gibbs. And he assured them, with all his assurance, that " the whole cost was not quite £2000." And, better still—" sleep

Eichmond j sleep in peace " —" it had been charged against the West Coast G-oldfields." Charged agaiust the West Coast Goldfields! And as what ? How simply answered ! "As part," said Mr Curtis, "of the expenses of these districts." And why —" my bleeding country !"—my much bled country ! —why ? " Because," continued Mr Curtis, " three-fourths of the line would run through that country." "Three-fourths of the line " might, would, or should—if it ever could—run through the "West Coast Goldfields. JSrgo the " whole cost " had been charged against the Goldfields. Well might Mr Curtis supplement this simple lesson in debit and credit with the comment that "he thought it had been cheaply managed." For, so it had—for liicbmond. But Mr Curtis was not done with it yet—he was neither done with the railway, nor, we may presume, with charging its cost to the Coast. Eichmond might sleep, but he would work. "If he were in office he should do his best to carry it through if it were possible." Yea, Eichmond might " sleep in peace and wake in joy " when the railway would be finished. It would be the West Coast, and the West Coast only, that would pay the expenses. " For nothing he could see " —and he had, no doubt, seen so much of it —"could open that country except a railway from one end to the other." And might we add that nothing we can sec —and we have seen so much of it—should, more than such as this, open the eyes of the West Coast constituency to the partial and utterly unfair system upon which, under the accountantship of Mr Curtis, the book-keeping of the Province is based —nothing should open their eyes more than this charging them with the preliminaries of a work which they never asked for and will never get. Canterbury's debiting AVestland with the cost of its Alpine road was a transaction in which, though it may bo a paradox to say so, there was some measure of credit compared with this deliberate imposition on this district of the cost of a scheme initiated entirely for the benefit of JS T elson. Mr Curtis has already said, and oft reiterated, that " lie should devote as much of the public funds to the West Coast as he thought fair and just." With him, and him alone, to " devote " upon the same principle as that upon which he debits, the West Coast may well remember Eichmond, and wish there were " auother Eichmond in the field."