THE EINSTEIN GIRL

Waipa Post, Volume 42, Issue 3269, 7 March 1931, Page 7

THE EINSTEIN GIRL

SCIENTIFIC MISS AMERICA. "You think of a gtrl as a perpendicular bio ogical phenomenon in short' skirts. "How do you know she is not an oval mass of bent space being thrown off, like electrons from swiftly retaining nitholwatts with all the speed of an idzol?" This definition of a girl was given by Professor Einstein to an insistent New York reporter who had pressed him to say whether he thought the American girl as attractive as her European sister. Thus in terms almost as cryptic and esoteric afe his famous thesis on relativity, the great scientist has broken the silence he had maintained. The reporter asked the professor if he would mind repeating the definition. Einstein said: I would. When Miss Grade Fie ds was given the Einsteinian theory of a girl to ponder over she was frankly puzzled. "I have it," she said at length. "I think Profesosr Einstein's conclusions are .self-evident, even to a chorus girl, and I agree with every one' of them. "Evidently he is a little up in the clouds, and as I am a star myself we probably see things in much the same light." • Miss Sophie Tucker had no time for higher mathematics. "I don't understand a word the professor ' says," she said. "It is quite apparent he has never -seen Sophie Tucker, or he would not use/such highfaluting scientific jorgon to describe a very obvious fact." Mr Les'ie Henson, after thinking the matter over carefully, declared: "I think the European girl stands a better chance of attractiveness these days, as owing to the Wall Street crashes itholwatts are at a premium in America. "As against this the Soviet Government has control of all the idzolhence the bad teeth in Wales and the raw knees in Scotland."