OUR OWN CABLES

Star (Christchurch), Issue 9303, 1 August 1908, Page 4

OUR OWN CABLES

This week's overpower ingly exciting and effervescing cable is : — THE KAISER'S MOUSTACHE. j DISCUSSION IN THE REICHSTAG. ' A NEW BILL PASSED. (By Ananiasgrara.) BERLIN, July 81. The singeing of tho Kaiser's moustache Jias given unbounded pleasure to the younger army officers, who were struggling hard to gro^r hair. After long discussion, in the Reichstag, a Bill was passed, entitled "The Hair-lip Act," to make the wearing of moustaches penal. The Footnote ; — ' (This, any friends, it a fearful thing. The moustache can be traced back to ■ the days of Antony and Boadicea. (<m& of his earliest, beet girls). When Antony had forgotten . to shave one day and kissed Boadicea, sho said, "I moustache you to shave." Swearing a terrible oath never to shave again, the beleaguered Emperor grew hair on, his upper lip. Coming back to Bo&dicea, he said, "See I I didn't ahavo, smarty ! M She answered, " W«JI, I jnoustaoh© you again." Hence the name. This accounts for the splashing noise an elephant anake9 when swimming. — Ed,, "Week.") A settlor *i Kiwiiea yrrftes to iho

Feilding "Star" about the finding of moa bones, which he estimates belonged to a bird which lived not more than seventy-five years ago, or perhaps fifty. The office poet felt sorry for that moa, and after long incubation ho (hatched out the following: — BAI»LAD OF THE LAST MOA. *WL«re fvto tho wingless birds th*t scoured the plain And foraged 'mfdsi the koromiko roots? la fancy fxoo we »©c ttem one© again, Scratching for yrormß, or nibbling tender ehoota, Wstti voices thai -rrere not at all like flutes, Silenced' long since*— so we> oaiiaot complain — j They may, for &U we know, have been but ( rautos; Alssl that fond Burmko should b« so vain! In blaciaj smnshin© or in pouring 1 rain The last m-aa wandered, loneliefft of brutes; Pcrchancai it dragg«d ; its limbs in vreary pain, Gasiiingf ite poor lifa out in' frightened too-te. As one who from his own dread shadow scoots, While all th« ground wae xcdiJaned with the> stain' SiecS in tha l&ab of many long pursuits — A1&»I tia-t fond surmifie should b» so vain! For fifty yaars ttt Kiwitea lain "W*- >o r tis grave the. dull owl nightly hoots, And sturdy settler sows tin annual grain And wing from Mother Earth her choicest fruita, The skeleton alone remains — what boots The prolongation of a sad refrain Or learned dissertations and disputes? Alftsl that fond suxnua* should be so vaia! *"*" Envoi. Dinoxnis! whosa belated ris© reftite3 The theorieii hatched in scientifio brain — Didst thou indeed 1 ses white men in dress euits? Alas! that fond surmise should bo so vain!