THE VICTIM OF ASTHMA.

Star (Christchurch), Issue 2435, 12 January 1876, Page 4

THE VICTIM OF ASTHMA.

Ho was a fat man, almost as wide as (he corridor door, ♦fYpur name ia Rufua Bimpaon, is ifcP" aake'd the Court. " Yea— oertaioly-t-rof oouraew-my name's Rufua Simpaoq, wheezod the fat man, in rtpW;'. ■^'■••- ■■ «Ahd jtoti btfi from Milwaukee P " " Why, yoßf-i-certainly. Lived thero twenty* eighfc gears' 0 " A&d you were tipsy last night P " ''Noi ■■''•i^-no, sir— l deny the oharge in fcoto, Never was more astonished in my life, air. Perhaps you have taken mo for aomo one else." ♦•Perhaps I have, Mr Simpson • but, if you werefa'fc tipsyi how oame you to be lying flat on the Walk, hat ia the gutter, satonol in fche atreet, and your feet spread all ovor P And, when an officer raieedyou up. Mr Simpson, you plainly and diatinotly exclaimed, 'Zon'fc g*way 'tin/ Jsjjjme 'lone, I'll knook 'er head

off l .Would a sober man make suohara. mark P " " May ifc please tbe Court," wheezed fche fat man, "lam a viotim of aathma. I waa bom of honest parents, and my life haa been -one long epooh of respectability. I am fat. I'd give tho world to bo loan, bufc I oan'b be. I oan't run. Other men can skip and gambol, whilo I must oroep. I oan't aing. I oan't whistle. lam an enthusiastic politician, but oan't holler for the oandidates on my tioket. If I try, my voioe morely make a Bound like wind aobbing through a corrugated atovepipe elbow | this asthma is killing me by inohes. The dootor says that I may livo to aoe strawberries oome again, but beyond that I dare nofc hopo. Last nighfc as I came into your beautiful oity, I was seized with a f aintnest and fell down, and, if the offioers had not found mo, I should moafc likely have been robbed and murdered. I am indeed greatly obliged, and I oan't oloae my remarks without complimenting tho efficient polios foroe of your handsome and orderly oity." "Fat man from Milwaukee," said tho courfc, as the prisoner paused, " onoe I waa like a ohild. Hooked at things as a ohild. I believed every story and statement, and my heart was free from suspioion. Men took advantage of me j women deoeivod mo with their orooodile toars • I felfc sad for the men who out their Hair oloae and bet .their money on dog fights. I have changed, Mr^Simpson. The lamb has beoome a wolf. That waa a goodapeeohof youra, but I oan't part company until you hand the olork a ten-dollar WIL* The priaoner smiled sadly, and paid the money.