MOUNT EDEN

Observer, Volume X, Issue 603, 24 January 1891, Page 18

MOUNT EDEN

The ghost has transferred its perambulations from Norman-street to Bleazard's tane. The man of the dark room and s*ome '>' One else were walking quietly through the .Jane the other night, when the fair one : clutched Willies arm a little hard sr than usual, nearly fainted,and asked, ' Whatever shallwe do ? There's a ghost in our path.' William thought of how the gallants of old protected their lady loves by drawing their . awords and advancing fearlessly on the enemy ; but not having any steel about him he drew his stick and manfully faced the foe, and in the Queen's name called upon it to surrender or he would do what had never been done before to it. The ghost not moving, he advanced, halted, and turned ghostly red — it was a white article of ladies' wearing apparel hanging on ?a line. Ask him gently, fair readers, whether he purposes presenting his sword to the citizens for placing in the Art Gallery, as a fitting souvenir of the victory over a foe of the spiritual world. Arthur has been seen sadly sitting on a window in the vicinity of the Obsebvjeb Office. Better leave him alone, Arthur. The O.M. knows you, but too many good.looking fellows frequent the office for you to single him out. Poets are running wild out this direction at present. A prominent young man, of temperance persuasion, was slipped up the other night by his fair one, and three nights per week he visits the lane and recites original poetry : —

Oh, Adam do not take to heart A fair maiden's fickle lark.

Dear Observer, you will please listen intently while I unfold the name of an opposition paper to you, which was promoted by two charming girls whp sat in office prim, and through the columns of their ' dear Mount Eden Observer,' as they chose to call it, gave advice gratuitously to Arthur not to keep Mamie out so late of a Sunday night; and advised Charlotte, who was getting her trousseau ready, always to be sure to have John's tea ready and how many raisins to put in puddings : never to put spirits in Christmas cakes for fear of John cultivating a ta3te for the Garden of Eden, and numberless other hints and recipes for householding, courting and shopping. The printing was done in the good old style, by hand, and sheets of foolscap wore filled every week with golden thoughts, fresh from the cerebrum of the fpir editors. But, alas 1 All their trouble and patience was thrown away. Some nasty correspondent sent an effusion in about one of the dear editors, and for the lack of brains caused throutrh her retirement, the paper smashed. The plant is now for sale, and the fair promoters are seeking fresh appointments. ' MATRIMONY. — An industrious young man (frait farmer) life insured for .£2OO, wishes to correspond with lady of means, with view to above.' Why did you not add cabinet-maker, amateur cook, pugilist, songster, spoon, etc. ? The so-called View Road blonde thinks Henry a much prettier name than Arthur. JShe is getting particular, and young fruit farmers that advertise through fcfannaford's Matrimonial Agency are not eligible. What did limp Jim think of the ovation on Tuesday night ? The Pukahi of View Koad looks sunburnt after his holiday. You should hear him talk about his stock driving. He must feel sore.