TAUBANGA.

Observer, Volume 3, Issue 57, 15 October 1881, Page 73

TAUBANGA.

— Mrs Hick gives the next "At Home." Gi-oodness ! what are we coming to ? Someone has imported a bicycle. They

are talking of starting a crematory here. Our citizens prefer being roasted to being depastured on by beasts. Wanted — The leading rolein a first-class opera company. Salary not so much an object as the standing of the artistes. — Apply to S., Post-office, Tauranga. It is rumoured Mr R. 0. Jordan intends taking a trip to Te Puke, in order to ascertain how business is conducted in the world's] markets. You havn't a mansion like the following in Auckland. A native school teacher on the Coast, in his application for enrolment, says : "I am the owner of a house containing six rooms and three acres of land." The open lodge meetings of the Grood Templars here are quite musical treats. If the ordinary lodge nights are as enjoyable as these extraordinary ones, "I would I were a Templar." The " Buster's " " Observer " is quite too utterly utter. What do you say to this ? " Our chief, of the mails, with the retiring disposition, musn't be annoyed by an humble defender of his domestic •peace, whom the juveniles annoy with crackers. The offending warrior is on the war-path for the Te Puke Swamps, and his tongue will no longer expostulate to the abhorrence of the elite." Now, isn't it just too too ? Our mails do occasionally show a disposition to retire to the north, but this is exceptional. However, the printer may have mulled it ; perhaps he meant males. The denizens of the Te Puke Swamp will surely appreciate the " defender" rejected by " our chief." The printer made hash of my last correspondence. Messrs. T. and B.s motto should have been, " Q-oing, going, gong " in reference to their latest acquisition, and not as it was published. In the par. re the " Two Monties," latter's should read " letter." What has become of the E. S ? Have the brilliant gatherings which have already taken place exhausted the brain power of the members ? The Society was organised to hold meetings during the winter months — until November. There is a feeling among the lower orders here against Mr Gr. M. Morris. Some of this feeling was manifested on Wednesday morning, when a number of inebriated larrikins destroyed the Bank garden. I cannot understand why this should exist. Mr Morris is a most courteous gentleman, and in the unfortunate Barlield-Kerwin cases did nothing more than his duty. The Wesleyan Bazaar is to eventuate shortly. Mr Asher has built a model native pah, to be raffled on the occasion ; it is quite a work of art. Contributions are rolling in. The Bees are still industriously engaged in their good work, so that the Bazaar is likely to be a brilliant success. The concert in aid of the Wesleyan Church Building Fund was very successful, from a pecuniary point of view. The hall was crowded to excess. As the curtain rose some excitement was caused by a lady in the front fainting. She was carried out to the tune of the "Victoria Valse," skillfully rendered by Mesdames Barber and Alexander. The Q-reyite candidate will be strongly supported by Mr R. Rhodes, shoemaker, with all his " sway," Mr E. G\ B. Moss, solicitor, and Rowdy Tom. Morris has put his supporters in a fix by changing his mind. He now announces his intention of standing for this district. He and Stewart are going to have a friendly toss up to see who is to retire. Norris is to toss the coin for them. All this might have been saved but for the smartness of one of jelly Bags supporters. Greorge Vasey has published Ms stumping programme. Poor Maketu only has the pleasure of his company to sleep. Jimmy. the Devil is running round with an Observer in his hand, telling everyone that he is your correspondent, but says, at the same time, that that Observer man never puts things in as they are sent. He has had a copy of the " Buster " that contained the letter signed by him (not written, I am sure) framed and hung up in the dining-room. The first pile of the Hairini Bridge was driven on Friday evening. The mem- [ bers of the County Council, ably looked after by ! their chairman, and the members of the Town | Board, also in care of their chairman, and a number of our townsmen were present ; but only two ladies — Miss Piercy and Mrs McLean. The first item on the programme was of course liquor, which was supplied t by Host Mac. The next was G-eo. Vesey's attempt to pull the rope and release the monkey. Like all monkeys, however, it was perverse, and would not gee xintil several muscular members of the crowd lent their assistance. The monkey, when it fell, broke the bottle of champagne — stay, was it champagne ? — and drove the pile about fourteen inches. After another blow of the monkey, Greo. Vesey started to speak, and appeared intent on informing us that but for his exertions Tauranga "would still be intact (not a pleasant thought this weather): He couldn't keep from politics, so concluded by asking those present to support him, much to the disgust of Rhodes and Co. The County Chairman was followed by the Rev. Jordan, whose discourse was not nearly so like a sermon as the preceding one. After letting us know all about the ancient Romans, and how they would have planted 100 ton guns on Hairini, and placed torpedoes in the stream, instead of building a bridge as we are doing, he also got down. Mr S. L. Clarke then made a few remarks, and was followed by Capt. Turner, who, blushing deeply, spoke very learnedly on the weather and his bashfulness. Mr McLean held forth with some sensible remarks for a short time longer. After a few interjections from Rhodes, Redmond, and R. C. J. we all proceeded to the business of the evening, viz., taking liberal potations of Coleraine internal, in order to neutralize the effect of the cold rain without.