TWO BOYS ON A SHIP

Taranaki Daily News, 1 December 1934, Page 9

TWO BOYS ON A SHIP

ILL-LUCK OF “ALPHONSO.” MEDALS FOR OTHER LAD. Carrying his listeners with him as shipmates on board the good ship “Misunderstanding,” Mr. John Masefield, the Poet Laureate, demonstrated his great gifts as a story-teller and a humorist in a delightful luncheon address recently to members of the Melbourne Rotary Club and their guests. Jokingly introduced to the large assemblage as “the cause of the rain and the grasshoppers and the author of ‘Waltzing Matilda,’ ” Mr. Masefield whimsically proceeded to clear up these “misunderstandings” with a “story of the great misunderstanding which once took place on the ship in which I was brought up.” The story was of “two little imps” named Bill and Alphonso, cadets on a famous Mersey training ship. The day was warm and the boys wanted to swim in the Mersey, although this was against the captain’s orders. After much planning it was decided that Alphonso—who might have been Mr. Masefield himself —should fall overboard, and then Bill would dive in and rescue him. “It was Alphonso’s idea,” said Mr. Massfield, “and, although the phrase had not then been invented, the unspoken thought which passed between these two imps must have been ‘You’ve said a mouthful.’ ” The plan miscarried, however. Bill was acclaimed as a hero, was awarded three medals, and even received gifts from Alphonso’s mother and father, while the unfortunate Alphonso was severely punished for being “so stupid” and condemned to carry a lifebuoy around his neck for a week. “All this only shows you,” Mr. Masefield added, “how misunderstandings do arise. After having heard this story you surely cannot persist in regarding me as the prime cause of either the rain or the grasshoppers, of being the author of ‘Waltzing Matilda,’ a poem which I have always admired, or even of being a satisfactory after-luncheon speaker!”