THE PASSING SHOW-UP.

Sun (Christchurch), Volume I, Issue 229, 31 October 1914, Page 2

THE PASSING SHOW-UP.

(By "Kusc-obin," of the Sydney "Bulletin.") GALLANT LITTLE BELGIUM. In these days, when we hear so much about the service done to humanity by gallant little Belgium, it would seem certain, from all the mush that is being poured out as to the virtues of teetotalism, that our Belgian friends lived in misery on cold tea. Even the snuffling ginger beer cranks, who want to make this fair Dominion into a country of dreadful gloom, are loud in their praise of Belgium. That their praise comes rather from their mouths than their pockets does -not matter now—that is another story! Anyway, I've just finished reading a life of Yerhaeren, the Belgian poet, who£ with Maeterlinck, another Belgian, stands in front of literary workers to-day. Let me quote you one passage:—"Modern Belgium, between ardent France and grave Germany, the focus of all the roads of Europe, is as rich in intellectual gifts as it is teeming with material wealth.The vitality of the Belgians is magnify-' cent. In no other part of Europe as in Flanders is pleasure so large a function of strength. In no other country i? life lived with such an intensity of gaiety. The Flemings must be seen in their sensual life, in the avidity they bring to it, in. the conscious they feel in it, in the endurance they show. Statistics show us that Belgium stands at the head of Europe in its consumption of alcohol. Out of every two houses, one is an inn. Every town, every village,, has its brewery. Nowhere else is. life so loved and lived with such a superabundance at such fever heat.?' '.'Dear, dear! Shocking place, Belgium! I never thought it was like that. Let us start a Ginger Beer for' Belgium Fund; you find the cash, and I'll tinkle the collection plate;" l ean hear the Sly Grog crauks exclaiming this. Good Lord, ami yet we suffer these whining killjoys.to go about telling; us how to live!' . Personally, the' thought of them disgusts me; they make me sick. Bali! . " " A JIM-JAM OF' GINGER BEER. , The shades of night were falling fast As through Cathedral Square there passed A mail who. uttered' dismal moans, And called aloud, in whining-tones , "Drink Ginger Beer!" His nose was as the nose of those Who suffer indigestion's-throes, And when I asked who was dead, He-onlv -moaned some more and said "Drink (finger B£er!" .' ' W.lnv goodness, gracious I" I replied, "I've got some liver pills inside. They 11:-put you right in half a. tick 1" V'Take- my 'advice,'' he answered quick, ■ - •-•'•'Drink Ginger : Beer I" ' 'You cheerful, happy sfeul I'' I- said. i."Atth6ugh an indigestije red . Belies, the counsel .you advise, And /hints of potions otherwise ' Than Ginger Beer, ''l'll take you. at your word. Come jon, And id a festive bun, . Togetjjei" we" will i tackle • eake, , And then, to wash" it 'de wn, we'll take * * Some Ginger Beei We hied'us .to a soft drink shop ; " ! * We" Heard" the glad, gay bottles pop, And, sad to tell it, really we , Got just as -full as full could be .; • ' Of' Ginger Beer. When of a sudden, one, two, thfee, It seemed to, him,. it seemed to me, We floated ut> and up and up, Each .swollen like ;a,,poisoned pup ; ' ' With Ginger Beer. f• -.said":-lijMCy.-Swrow*s«r, "whiskered friend, Wherever, will : this journey! end ? That, light to the moon, We'll both'bo ,up to-Saturn sod!a . On Ginger .Beer/*! >ly wowser friend: he smiled a' smile, I fearful lest I burst the while, " And- whispered softlv. "Don't you think It's up to us to have a drink. Of * Ginger Beer?'' I think I had been really wild, Butjixst" a something when he smiled Suggested, that perhaps he knew, This friend of mine,; a thing or two .Of Ginger Bee?.*,. . And we floated up to And grazed some v half a dozen stars, We eame at last . upon, a place, . . Some unfrequented la\o,in space, " - ''Called Ginger Be^r. My friend, . lie blushed a blush of shame, ''A rose by any other name Would smell as sweet; so now make haste And swallow just' a little taste Of Ginger Beer." And .in a pocket none could see He dived his hand, producing me £ bottle that I'll seen before. That now this printed label bore: "Real Ginger Beer." I took a sip .- . V perhaps it's best That I should not explain the rest, Except when I came dpAvn to earth I didn't feel like making mirth Of Ginger Beer. And yet, the strangest thing of all," rn spite ;of my, celestial fall, I saw my friend before me there, Still whining-in Cathedral Square: "Drink Ginger Beer I" . •. .(.'■•• «•"''" > • »■ < MORAL. When indigestion makes a nose • ..<•• Shine like a Rose of Sharon rose, Be sure there's more than meets the eye, And don't to rash conclusions fly Of Ginger Beer. i

THE < * BULLETIN'' ON BOOZE. .In-.a current editorial traversing a social evil of far greater danger to the community than Drink in its worst manifestations, th-? Sydney "Bulletin" makes these pertinent remarks:— "The drink evil has been more overworked by amateur sociologists than any other. It has been pointed to as the cause of poverty and disease, when more often it has been merely the result of these things. Alcoholism may produce wasters, but, except in rare cases, it does not injure the health of, innocent persons. Yet the drink curse | can only be sold in place"? that are licensed, under conditions that are strict and numerous,- and the person who transgresses these conditions is in danger of having taken from him the means by which lie lives. On the other hand, the much more terrible syphilis curse is almost boycotted by social reformers; they not only refrain from grappling with it, but often, even decline to recognise its existence. The idea that brothels should be licensed the same as pubs is howled down, on the alleged ground that, this would be "giving official recognition to sin" . . . as though sin would worry if it wash't recognised. Bung is compelled to serve his clients with pure beer; but. neither the Pure Foods Aet, the Thistles Act, : the Hackney Carriages Act, or any other old measure compels Rahab to take similar precautions. If Lais behaves herself in. an objectionable manner she has not a license which can be endorsed, and therefore she is in no danger of losing her living; at the worst she is shooed into another street or suburb to enlarge the area-of her evil influence, And the reason of thisi

policy, it seems, is that-Eahab, being very liable to be a genuine, nasty, insanitary curse, the ecclesiastical Chadband and the political Stiggins alike shrink from dealing with her, preferring to devote their, attention io a picturesque, melodramatic, and largelybogus curse like the Demon Dermic.-"' Reference to 'the report of the Medieal Congress, held recentiy in Auckland, will show the vital application this outspoken deliverance has to the Dominion. Yes, and to Christehurch too! Get the report and read it. You'll see. - - SAVED. ,■• | I had just got through a heavy day's work, and, meeting a friend, we strolled over to the United Service for a drink, I had a. small glass of English aleAnd then it dawned upon me—the heinousness of my offence. You see, I had. been reading a literary masterpiece that day, from the brilliant pen of the RevCocker, and the warnings it so solemnly sounded had made a very real impression; upon ipe.. I realised the danger I was "in. \I; knew .was treadingthe amber pathway to jCrime; Lunacy, Incendiarism,- General Paralysis,-. and Pauperism. The imminence of my fate '-appalled me. I rushed into'' tl« Street like, one distraught, arid" took my way homewards with that indefinable fear '•df v toyself;was the first syhiptom of approaching madness. : On my 7 way I noticed a. young man, evidently on his -way to the little courier : store to a packet of candles for the house/ " Ah } " . I said, "now I must exercise heroic selfcontrol. "Under the bru.talising influence lof that English; ale,; I am apt to gripi this unoffending citizen by the -throat | and squeeze out his Hnen-drajnrig life.. | Or I might seize him by. his Broadway j tie and hurl him- against .the neareststone wall; in my phrenzy; Perhaps the glas& of ale will influenceme in another direction —I may suffer \ the delusion. tliat 1 ~aui the 9 "o'clock tramear, and. run furiously in order to catch, myself; or that I'm the Rev. Ceeker, with amission in life to make the other fellow see the-error of his ways. au\d the cor-rectness-of my owA, Again, : I .had-toi-conquer the passing thought , that my ■ wife and family were starving ; we had stolen the' neighbour 'slast fowl* and now- nothing remained- for us but dire; .and abject starvjation^O,^^:^ij^ei^' rible. I swore that again would; ,1 shake tlie very pillars of byv drinking a single' glass of ale after t ahard day's toil. The young mait~ had escaped unhurt—l still sufficient strength? of purpose left, 'stifle* my mad impulse. But, I told myself, had I but drunk a second glass of ale, with my : will power, undermined by its. predecessor, ail these things I mentionabove might have happened. I arrived home a physical wreck; my nerves shattered, my body quivei-ing like an aspenleaf.. It was only, when myyouiigest son .(aged.ten months) came to my rescue with* the remnant ot' his sherbetsucker that I* attained • normal tranquility; Brothers, .take this lesson from. me. If you wish to become a criminal a lunatic, and a pauper, nothing more is necesSary-than to drink one glass ofale. The r.est is, easy. ; , ..... (Published by arrangement.)