WHY SHOULD MEN SWEAR !
The Society for the Suppression of Profanity has earnestly begun its labours m Boston, and its roll of membership is daily increasing. It proposes to thoroughly break alljmen with whom it comes ingcontact of the lamentable and useless habit of swearing, first by toning the language down from profane expletives to vigorous but harmless exclamations, and then, when the liver of the patient has acquired the necessary strength, doing away with excited exclamations altogether. Why men should swear has been a profound mystery for all ages. Horace, shocked at seeing his friend Ovid begin an elegy with Jamduaum — which is a very bad word m Latin, and doesn't sound well m even a banished poet's mouth — wrote his famous and exemplary ode, beginning " Odi profanum," which meant that he hated anything like swearing, and wouldn't tolerate the thing even m his own house. Cicero, on that memorable occasion when Catiline so far forgot himself as to swear like a fisherworaan m the Roman House of Representatives, called him to order by exclaiming, " Quern ad flnem jactabit furor iste tuus ?" which welltimed and appropriate expostulation, particularly where he alluded to the jack rabbit, had the effect of bringing the impolite but well-meauing Catiline to his senses. Homer, Thucydides, and Gibbon have all devoted pages upon pages to the study of the subject. Quintillian said that he could not understand why a man should swear m the morning just because he can't find the soap, and why, after he has found it m the slop bucket, he should swear again, and then swear because the towel is missing when he paws around for it with his eyes full of soap. This was 2,000 years ago, and still the same thing goes on every morning m every well-regulated family, and no one knows the secret of it; The S.F.T.S.O.P. proposes to commence by supplying the world with a little dictionary containing words of awful sound, but harmless meaning. "Drat it," "By this hokey." "So help me Nicholson's Pavement," etc., are among the number. Then it provides each member with ' a powerful electro magnet of novel construction. All collar -buttons, studs, suspender buckles, etc. , are to be made of iron or steel. Thus, m the morning, all a man has to do, instead of going down on allfours and making wild sweeps under the bed with the boot jack, is to turn the current of the magnet, and instantly all the steel studs, etc,, m the room will fly to it and stick there, obviating all necesity for profanity. There are many other appliances .the society intends bringing m, especially for bull-drivers, mule-herders, and sailors, and it is to be expected that before long their good work will be felt,— *' New Orleans Times.'*
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Bibliographic details
Poverty Bay Herald, Volume VI, Issue 899, 20 September 1879, Page 2
Word Count
463WHY SHOULD MEN SWEAR ! Poverty Bay Herald, Volume VI, Issue 899, 20 September 1879, Page 2
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