In the Candid Future.

Otago Witness, Issue 2085, 8 February 1894, Page 49

In the Candid Future.

Did you ever think what an undressed exhibition of our sentiments would be like ? Take, for instance, this talk between two men of a.o. j 2000, when truth may have become habitual ; and would you approve of it ? A : " How do you do, B ? Not that I care, but it's the thing to say." B : •• I'm well. You're not, for your nose is red. You drink too much." A : •• You don't, because you can't afford it. Business is slack with you." B : "So it is. I wish you'd die, or go to Jericho, and give mo an opening. Family well ? I was wondering whether the red on your wife's face was health or paint." y A : " Oh, that's paint. Your sleeve's threadbare. Haven't you better sense than to select such clothes ?" B: " Got the sense, but not the money. Ha, ha ! I wish you'd ask me to dine with you today." A : " Can't. Dressmaker at the house. Besides, wife told me to invite nobody, for she was goiDg to have a made up dinner." B : "I can eat that." A : " But she mentioned you especially ; your appetite is so large." B : "If it was small I could buy enough at a restaurant." A : " I daresay she will let you come next week ; and perhaps you can bring the children, though she dislikes that girl of yours— the shrill one, with the red hair and cross eyes." B : " Susie is not popular ; but I've no doubt I can send her to a neighbour's to spend the evening " A : •• Why doesn't your wife tone her down ? But then your wife is a person of such narrow views and limited knowledge and want of force and perception that I suppose she can't." B: "Do you really think that? Of course, or you would not have said so. By the way, I was told that when you remarked to Casey that his daughter was ugly and brazen, he punched your head." A: "So he did. Most remarkable thiDg ! For what I said was true." B : •' I suppose you thrashed him ?" A : " I tried to ; but I managed to get all the thrashing myself. Did you go flahirg on SaturB : "No ; on Sunday. Caught three halfpound trout." A : " Half- pound ? Humph ! You come fishing with me, some time. Wnen I was up that brook last summer " B: J' Aren't you dry ?" |gA : •' Yes ; let's have some beer. Not that I care whether " fi«B : " Ob, I'll drink. It's the best thiDg you've said, thus far." (Interval for five glasses of beer.) A : "I like you more than I did, and I'll pay for all of them." B: "You can afford to. I'll buy you some beer next time, if I get my rent paid. Lend me half a crown." <£A : " I hate to do it— but there it is. Pay it back, some time." B : "Now lam glad that I met you. Have another glass of beer with mo."