Her Grammar.

Otago Witness, Issue 1778, 19 December 1885, Page 27

Her Grammar.

It is a pathetic sight to watch the meanderings of the childish mind through the intricacies of English grammar. Little Jane had repeatedly been reproved for doing violence to the moods and tenses of the verb "to bo." She would say " I be," instead of " I am," and for '\ time it seemed as if no one could prevent it. Finally Aunt Kate made a rule not to auswer an incorrect question, but wait until it was corrected. One day the two sat together, Aunt Kate busy with embroidery, and little Jane over her dolls. Presently doll society became tedious, and the child's attention was attracted to the embroidery frame. " Aunt Kate," said she, " please tell me what that is going to be ?" But Aunt Kate was courting and did not answer. Fatal woi'd, be ! It was her old enemy, and to it alone could the child ascribe the silence that followed. " Aunt Kate," she persisted, with an honest attempt to correct her mistake, " please tell me what is going to am ?" Still aunty sat silently counting, though her lip curled with amusement. Jane sighed, but made another patient effort. " Will you please tell me svhat that is going to are?" Aunt Kate counted on, perhaps by this tinif. actuated by a wicked desire to know what would come next. The little girl gathered her energies for one last and great effort. " Aunt Kate, what am that going to are ?'' A Bright Prospect for Jim. — "Mamma, dear, I'm going to break off my engagement with Jim. I'm satisfied that we never could be happy together," said a Bays water young lady one da5 r last week. " Aud why not ? Jim's a nice fellow,"' replied her mother, much surprised. " I have found out that he is an infidel." "And what's that?" " Why, he has no religion — doesn't believe in eternal punishment." " Oh, he doesn't, eh? Well, you marry , him, and we'll take that notion out of his head quick enough," and the old lady's jaws came together with a snap. A Manly Little Fellow. — Parson Houghton, of Dallas, has a little son who is decidedly precocious. Yesterday Mrs Hough ton said to the boy, who is six years old : " Your father brought you home such a nice little drum for a present, and you never even kissed him for it." " What are you thinking about, ma ?" x-eplied the boy; "we men never kiss each other." — Texas Sittings. Raison d'Etrk.— Eulalia : " Why, dear, are bangs coming in fashion again ?" Eudora : " I don't know. lam going to wear mine anyhow." " They certainly are becoming." " Oh, that's not the reason. You know I'm engaged to Rev. Algernon De Good, the new minister." " Yes, dear, but what has that got to do with it?" " Why, he's so modest it's the only way I can prevent him from kissing my forehead instead of my lips." — Philadelphia Call. — The poor are more extravagant than the rich, and this is just what ke^ps them poor ; for the sake of one feast they are willing to starve three days.

It 15 Worth a Thial.— " I was' troubled for many years with kidney complaint, gra\ el, &c. ; my blood became thin, T was dull and inactive, could hardly crawl about, and was an old worn-out man all over, and could a;ot nothing to help me until I got American Co.'s Hop JJittkhs, and now my blood and kidneys lire all right, and I am as active as a msui of MO although I am 72, and I have 710 doubt it will do as well for others of mv age. It is worth the trial." — (Father.)— JToticc. "