PASSING NOTES.

Otago Daily Times, Issue 18395, 5 November 1921, Page 4

PASSING NOTES.

When the chops and changes of Mr Lloyd George’s career are recalled, his ups and downs, his waxings and his wanings—his Limehousc time, blazing as the red star of revolution ; his Marconi time, suffering all but total eclipse—when these things are recalled, his predominance to-day—Chief Advisor at the Palace, Ruler of the Spirits in the House—comes nothing short of miracle; And yet Lloyd George yields readily to analysis. His miracle is the miracle of talking commonsense and talking it pointedly. Merely that. Whatever the exigency of the hour, it is always Lloyd George who says the fitting thing; with Lloyd George is the missing word. No assembly in the world is quicker to recognise and welcome these aptitudes than the British House of Commons. And so, when Lloyd George is in a category the worst possible—has been shaking hands with rebels and pouring out tea for assassins,—he rises in the House to prolonged cheering, and carries the vote of absolution by a 10 to 1 majority. "AH very well,” say the Fainthearts and Feeblenainds, “ but you can’t trust Lloyd George.” Maybe yes, maybe no. Anyhow, we are not asked to trust him. With all his wizardry, Lloyd George cannot commit us to a settlement with Sinn Fein without the backing of Parliament, and—back of that again—the backing of the country.

"It is said that when Mr de Yalera and Sir James Craig met, the Sinn Fein leader took an hour and a-half to bring the tale of Ireland’s woes down to Cromwell’s time, and that the Ulsterman’s only contribution to the discussion was ;a‘ request that he might bo allowed to smoke.” (Saturday Review, September 3.) The meeting with the Ulster Premier was an earlv incident of the series of conferences, so called, a series that “like a wounded snake drags its slow length along.” Sir James, who is a Scot—from that part of Scotland called the North of Ireland, —was brought to London for the purpose of this meeting. We can imagine his square-jawed coolness, listening to the flatulent rhetoric of the Sinn Feincr, “lost in the mists of declamatory self-pity,” as the Saturday Review says. Might he smoke? —let us hope he might and did. The mists of declamatory self-pity—how well we know them! If in the columns of the Daily Times you come upon a Sinn Fein letter yards long, be not dismayed. Full many a gem of purest ray seren© The dark unfathomed caves of ocean bear. Even such a gem may reward you in these dark, unfathomed caves—e.g.; Let us thjnk of the problem iii terms of personality. We may legitimately conceive of a nation as having, in its corporate life, a personality of its own. As such, it is entitled to the respect and to tho independence which attach to the status of being a person. This is a right inalienable by any treaty. It . can never cease to be a right. Personhood is sacred and inviolable; to respect it is one formulation of the Kantian categorical imperative. Human freedom is an impulse of the soul. In presence of Personhood and the Kantian categorical imperative, our Irish peasant, native product of “th’ ould sod,” will uneasily shift and shuffle, feeling himself at-a loss. Wan time, on "Ireland ia e nation” We tuk our station, And on "self-determination.” But now, begob, 'Tia Personhood is going to do the job. An’ suro there’s divvil a man alive Could /bate our gorry-katical timper-a-tive; Nor iver a man alive Could say what timper that is, bar the praste. •Av coorso the clargy knows; But give the ginoral a taste— Divvil the laatc! 'Tis not their jooty. ’Bis but their jooty to dishcloso ' The Kant that sinds it. An’ for Ireland’s good intinds it— Kant in Germany raised; — An’ gorry-katical is German; —Hiv’n be praised!

"That part of Scotland called the North of' Ireland.” From the Mull of Kintyre—which is in Argyll—with Scotland behind you, the long line of the Irish coast is.'seen almost beneath your feet, writes a correspondent of the Spectator. From Matanaka on the Otago tittoral may be seen The Nuggets at three times the distance. Tire narrow strip of waterway between South-West Scotland and North-East Ireland does not divide; it unites. Crossing easily from shore to shore, people that a mountain system would have separated have intermingled freely. There are not two populations; there is one population, in taco one, and one' in political ideals. Sinn Fein that talks of controlling Ulster might as reasonably talk of controlling the projecting peninsulas of Scotland. -Sinn Fein talk on that subject is silliness; and sheer silliness is the notion that? any island of the British archipelago may, because it is an island, set up as a separate nation. For Ulster as “the crux.” with chafferings over that crux in the conference and chatterings in the cables, there is nothing to fear. We may possess our souls in patience. Ulster is quite able to take care of itself.

Whilst hon. members in ’Wellington from the Premier downwards aro protesting that they know nothing whatever about racing and have never been on a racecourse in their lives, or hardly ever, we have a clergyman in Auckland—Church of England, I believe —who frankly confesses that he has been there and still would go; moreover, that next time a brother cleric will go with him. And so in this Erewhon of ours things seem to be a good deal upside down. Ministers of religion attend the races; members of Parliament, who argue for racing permits till two in. tho morning—to be accurate the division was taken at 1.42 a.m.—aro shy of admitting that over they were there. Mr Massey’s professing, or confessing, is altogether peculiar: I don’t pretend to ho an authority on racing, though I have been to race meetings on many occasions, especially since I have been in charge of the finances of the ’country.—(Members : Oh, oh, and laughter.)

Since he had been in charge of the finances, of. the country!—was it. then, that ho might look after tho £500,000 a year the finances of the country derive from the totalisator?—or was it that he might nick up a financial wrinkle or two from tho betting ring? If there is a betting ring;—like hon. members I have never been on a racecourse, or hardly ever, and am in a condition of virtuous ignorance. But Mr Massey owes tho public an explanation.

In New South Wales the people choose the Parliament, but the Caucus chooses the Ministers. Under Caucus ascendency the decencies of life in official circles show a sharp decline. It will soon he as the naval officer reported of manners and customs in a savage island; “Manners ncJsie, (customs nasty.” For example: Sydney, November 3 A free fight occurred in the Assembly as the result of Mr Onslow (Progressive) and Mr Molesworth (Labour) coming to blows. A number of members exchanged blows during the meloe. Similarly in the Sydney City Council, a few days earlier, Alderman Holdsworth (Labour) assaulted Alderman R. D. Meagher, both being knocked to the floor. In the same council an argument between a councillor and tho Lord Mayor assumed this form : ' The Councillor: You are a dirty, contemptible cur. You are a dirty dog. The Lord Mayor: You are worse than that. And so on, in the approved “You’re another” style.' This is the Lord Mayor who, as recent!'/ reported, ' scruples about honouring the Union Jack on festival days. We must expect, of course, that Labour extremists will be extreme all round. In our own Parliament iao ether night Mr MCombs supported by statistics the pleasant paradox that capital punishment encourages murder, and Mr Holland “contended that . tho abolition of capital punishment would result in fewer murders.” Apparently it is the opinion of these Labour members that people are moved to commit murders cy khcJi desire to fee hanged..

Prom a representative of the London Missionary Society lecturing in Dunedin we get some first-hand information about India. As a rule, the optimism of the returned missionary is subject to discount. But in the cheery hopefulness of this returned missionary—Air Brough his name is—l earnestly desire to share. In effect he tolls us that India is safe for the Prince of Wales, now on his way; that the Ghandi influence is waning; that the newly-descfended boon of Parliamentary government is “a splendid success” ; and ( that India’s 320 millions are going to be happy in exercising the electoral franchise, which blessed privilege—that nothing may be lacking—is now extended to/ women. As this witness was 20 years a municipal Councillor in Erode, a biggish town in the Madras Presidency, and at one time its elected mayor, he ought to know what he is talking about. Missionaiy as well: —and his missionary figures set one gasping:— A missionary was a very busy person. He had himself 91 schools; he had started with two. Last year he had in addition 80 Government schools, making a total of 171. Ho. had 107 congregations, 11 banks, and 800 acres of settlement land. He was on 34 committees. Too much schooling is a risky thing to say. -But the Ghandi malcontents who swarm in the lower grades of the civil service and who run the vernacular press are the product of British quixotism in attempting to graft the West upon the East. “Failed 8.A.” the baboo of our training signs himself with pride when advertising for a billet. It is not a Varsity baboo who writes the following letter, but a common, cvery-day Madras milkman; nevertheless must he also have gone through the schools. i To the Secretary, Y.W.C.A., Vepery. Respected Madam, —Most humbly I beg to state that I am supplying milk at the rate of 2£ measures per rupee without adding neither water nor froth, which incurs a great, loss on me, as the prices of the cows’ foodstuffs and commodities have risen into three or four folded. There are a lot of fake milkmen will say that they would supply 2j> or 3 meas per rupee on mere prejudice, besides they can not stand longer duo to finance and character. So I humbly request you to kindly allow, me to supply 2 meas per rupee as the business does not meet froth ends. Sometimes I am aeked to supply extra milk pure. I can’t expect my cows to milk extra whenever I desired. Similarly I request you to allow me to supply outside milk for all extras. Begging to be excused for the trouble given, I beg to remain Hond Madam Your most obedt Servant Govindocpillai, milkman. (London “Spectator,” September 17.) The Young Women’s Christian Association secretary adds a comment: “Ho aHvays has to bring his cows into the compound, and has to be watched every minute while he milks for us, or there would be water in every day, and the watcher must not take her eyes off him for one minute.”

Someone sends me a new batch of examination howlers: — Walter Scott was imprisoned in the Tower because he could. not pay his debts; while there he wrote the Waverley Novels, but he was afterwards burnt alive; he also brought tobacco from Virginia, so called after his beloved mistress Queen Elizabeth. James I claimed the Throne of England through his grandmother, because he hod no father. Childe Harold was defeated by William the Conqueror at the Battle of Hastings. ■ By eating slowly, food is digested before it is swallowed and thus enriches the blood, which goes down one leg and up the other. Things which are impossible ate equal to one another. Things which are equal to each other are equal to anything else. To find the number of square feet in a room you multiply the room by the number of feet. The product is the result. The side in front of the biggest angle is called the hypophosphate. Martin Luther was nailed to the church door of Wittenberg for selling papal indulgences. The Menai Straits are crossed by a tubercular bridge. Ben Jonson survived Shakespeare in some respects. The Habeas Corpus Act was that a man couldn’t be kept in prison against his will. The masculine of heroine ia kipper. The last may bring in an old story. An eminent Continental divine was visiting the Rev. Dr Chalmers, of “Disruption” fame. Kippered herring was served for breakfast, and the visitor learned on inquiry that “kippered’’.meant “preserved.” Later, being invited to take part in the family devotions, he/prayed that the Lord would “kipper Dr Chalmers.” As for examination howlers, they never change. The new are as the old, and the old are as the new, and there is always a laugh in them. At the expense of the schoolmaster. ,Dear “Givis,”—Would you please oblige me by informing me ■as to Mr Massey’s, the Labour Party’s, and the Liberal Party’s policies? A cool request. She (it is a shel might bo saying merely, “Pass the salt. However, the Delphic oracle usually responded, to inquiries, though the response was not always intelligible. I follow precedent. Mr Massey hopes to repeat m succeeding years the success of last year, when ho extracted from the pockets of the people six million pounds more than the public service of the year required, and his policy is to remain in office till h© does it. The policy of the Liberal Party is to put Mr Massey out of office, on any terms, for any cause, and 1 at the earliest possible date. The policy of the Labour Party, its hope of office being nil, is to mak© itself a general nuisance to the other two. All parties alike profess to regret the lost Golden Ago (in the existence of which they do not believe), When non© was for a party; When all were for th© State; When th© great man helped the poor, And th© poor man helped the great, and to desire its return. , If it did return, the party-man would have but one thing to say—“ Othello’s occupation’s gone." Orvis.