WANTED TO SELL A BALDHEADED MAN A HAIR-BRUSH.

Oamaru Mail, Volume I, Issue 224, 10 January 1877, Page 2

WANTED TO SELL A BALDHEADED MAN A HAIR-BRUSH.

A long-waisted lady, having a seductive smile and winning ways, called upon a Detroit shoemaker the other day to convince him that he needed a metal hairbrush—a novelty just out and in the hands of canvassers. After she had put in about five minutes talk, he uncovered his bald head, and asked : " Where is there anything to brush with it V "Then your wife could use it," she said. " My wife is dead, poor soul." " Then your daughters " * "I have no daughters; and the only son I have went crazy from brushing his hair too much." "I believe this brush would help a new growth of Lair on your sc.iip," she said unwilling to let him off. " Doii'c want any hair there," he replied ; " I was never so happy as since I became bald-headed." '• Well, don't you ever brush your scalp /" "Never. I have it sand-papered four times per year, and the rest of the time it must get along the best it can." "I am in great need of mon:'j," she remarked, as s ;e looked around the shop. "So am I," he replied, as he pegged away. " I haven't seen but three dollars in the last two weeks." " It would almost be an act of charity to buy of me," she pleaded. " I never give to charity, madam. I haven't given a shilling to anyone, or to any object, for the last thirty years." "Your second Avife might want the brush." " I shall never marry again. I hate all women." "Then you don't think you could use it ?" she asked, as she rose up. " Yes, I could take it and brush my dog's, ears clean back to his tail, and brush. Ids tail clear over Ids nose, or I could make it over into a snow-shovel, or sell it to some sawmill, or repair my wheel, barrow with it, but I said 'no,' and I shall stick to it. lam bald-headed, uglytempered, sinful, malicious, and desperate, but I pride myself in keeping my word ; and, madam, if metal hair-brushes, and bald-headed men, and female agents were as thick as buttons on a girl's dress my tlvunderous voice would still cry, ' N-o-u-g-li—no !' "—Detroit Free Press.