RANDOM NOTES.

Oamaru Mail, Volume I, Issue 52, 21 June 1876, Page 2

RANDOM NOTES.

Br MAGGUFFIN.

" * " A chiel's amang- ye takin' notes, An' faith he'il prent 'em." I am a stranger in AVhaniaru (the orthography is according to the vernacular), and consequently everything of and apx>ertaining thereto does not wear to me the same roseate hue that may greet the delighted eyes of its older residents ; yet I am free to admit that in the matter of weather it has something to boast about. While the Provincial capital appears to suffer from a chronic moisture, the skies that cover its northern rival seldom exhibit a cloud. Jupiter Pluvius, however, does once in a while shower his blessings down, and then with such effect that it would seem a wise and providential dispensation that his visits should partake of the angelic character, and be "few, and far between." Like the gentleman of whom the bard has sung, and whose mode and instrument of progression were a paddle and canoe, I "have travelled about a bit in my time, and of countries I've seen a few," but for real, genuine, downright bomi-fide mud—mud un-

adulterated and without alloy—mud pur et simple—l unhesitatingly, and without the slightest shadow of a doubt, yield the palm to Whamaru. Not long since I read that a new industry had been started in Paris for the manufacture of cheese out of mud, and it was then stated that one enterprising firm had contracted with the Commune for the cleansing of the streets, the sweepings thereof being the only recompense sought. Now, I am not prepared to assert that I consider it quite the cheese to apply the commodity of which Whamaru seems to be so jirolific in exactly that way—much less to use it for home consumption—but I cannot help thinking that in the hands of those willing to utilise the Parisian experience, a mine of wealth lies before our very doors. Somebody has said that speech was given to man wherewith to conceal his thoughts. I am not aware whether that cynical somebody had Vice-regal Addresses in his mind's eye when he made his paradoxical remark ; nor yet whether the deliverers of Vice-regal Addresses are indebted to him for the hint, and merely act thereupon. However, a careful perusal of the Speech from the Tliroue by the Most Noble of Kormanby convinces me that—while its origin is in doubt—its utilisation is general. It struck me that while gentle Phipps was gushing over tiie reclaiming of the "noble savage,'" and eloquent in his praises of the hosjjitality showered upon him, that a few words regarding the tour of Sir Ju himself (this is not intended as a pun) would not have been out of place ; and it is worthy of something more than a remark that the gubernatorial mouthpiece of the Government maintained a refreshing reticence regarding the millions already borrowed by the wily financial diplomacy of the Premier* or the six millions it is proposed still to borrow. For ambiguity of expression, general vagueness, and a plethora of nothingness, commend me to Opening Speeches, of which this last is a unique specimen. Toray religious mind, there was but one intelligible paragraph in the whole—that in which it says"—" And I pray that the Almighty will so guide and order your deliberations that they may be productive of happiness and prosperity to the people of New Zealand ;" and to this prayer I devoutly say, Amen !

" What's in a name ': " A great deal sometimes, and it must have been something more than mere coincidence which doomed all who came of the Royal House of Stuart to disaster and destruction. James I. was murdered in his bed by his uncle, the Duke of Achol ; his son was killed at the siege of Roxburgh by the bursting of a cannon ; the subjects'of James 111. rebelled against him, and he paid the penalty of his tyranny by his death ; James IV. left his body on the Field of Flodden ; all are acquainted with the sorrows, sufferings, and bloody death of Mary Stuart, the beautiful but hapless Queen of Scotr-s; the reigns of the Fifth and Sixth Jameses were not without their troubles : Charles I. lost his head, while Charles the Second lost his Crown, and although afterwards restored, his end was far from happy : James 11. died in exile, driven from his throne and country by his unnatural daughter; while Bonnie Prince Charlie, in whom all the hopes of the Stuart line were centred, once the peerless Chevalier, developed into a miserable, degraded, and dissipated debauchee, despised while living, and unmourned for when dead. Can this long catalogue of disaster following generation after generation until ending in the extinction of a kingly line, be nothing more than coincidence ; or is it no more, that during the past year four .immigrant ships whose name commence with " Strath'' have come to grief. It is scarcely necessary to refer to the ill-fated Strathmore, and its total destruction on the Crozets Islands ; the Strathnaver, which has never been heard of, and of whose doom not a solitary survivor remains to tell; the Strathclyde, which met with a collision in the Channel, the waters of which now roll over her ; and the Strathearn, the crew of which mutined on the voyage to Brisbane.

Did I go to the meeting on Monday night? Yes, indeed I did, and a tamer affair—considering the importance of the object for •which it was convened—l have rarely witnessed. As I said before, I am a stranger, yet I am fully alive to the necessity that exists for the people of this district taking time by the forelock, and securing the trade of the Waimatc. When I heard Major Steward announce the fact that lie had secured the signature of sixty-eight of the principal townsmen in as many minutes, and their expression that the step taken was the proper thing to do, I naturally expected that sixty at least of that number would have put in an appearance. To my surprise, however, I found the numbers reversed, for while the three score preferred the ease and comfort of their firesides, scarcely the smaller number of the requisitionists took advantage of his Worship's acquiescence thereto, Xow, it is scarcely fair that in a matter in which all should take a part, the burden should be en-

tirely thrown upon a willing few. As it was, -the gentleman who was instrumental in getting the meeting together had the "major" portion of the labour to perform. There cannot be a shadow of a doubt but that whichever side first becomes linked with Waimate, it will in future claim its export and import trade. To use a simile which will probably come home to every one : There is not a.town, perhaps, in the Colony but possesses a thoroughfare, one side of which take precedence of the other ; why ? Because it had the advantage of seniority, and had places of business erected, while the opposite portion remained unbuilt iipon. Take Thames-street, for instance. Does any one believe that, no matter what places of business occupy the west side of the it may ever hope to rival the opposite ? No ! people have got too much accustomed to traverse the east side, and when looked upon from a business point of view, will always take precedence. So it is with the question at issue. Tiinarn and Oamaru are both in the field, and whichever horse first jumps the ditch, may hope to retain the prize.