WISE AND OTHERWISE

Northland Age, Volume 25, Issue 16, 13 August 1925, Page 5

WISE AND OTHERWISE

ME. I am a bring idolised by me, Of all earth's creatures love I me the best; I crawl wilhin myself, a welcome guest, And whisper of a world of snobbery; Myself laughs at my wit in repartee, Nor fails to point mv own subtle jest, I rise to eloquence to my request, And dramatise myself eternally; In argument I'm always on my side, My point of view is never wholly wrong; When others once in favour lose their place, I still have me whatever may betide; I even like to hear me sing a song, And find nogreat annoyance with my face. DITCHED. "And yousay you lost control of your car?” ‘‘Yes. I couldn’t keep up the instalments." TO ORDER. JILL: "1 wish the Lord had made me a man.” Jack: “He did. I’m it." ACCEPTABLE. Wayback Subscriber: “That was a rotten pome you ’ad in this week.” DITTO Editor: “I know, but the chap sent stamps for return, an’ I was needin’ stamps." §INS OF OMMISSION AND COMMISSION. Reverend One: “I don’t know what's wrong with the bally machine.” Reverend Other: “Ah, brother, you have left undone those things you ought to have done, and have done those things you ought not to have done.” NOT QUITE SO WELL PUT AS IT MIGHT HAVE BEEN. Magistrate (to youthful witness); “He threw a stone eh? How big?" JuveniS: “A terrible big one. ” Magistrate: “As big as my head?” JUVENIS: "About. But not so thick.” GAME TO THE LAST Mr. FOOZLE; “I’m fed up with you laughing at my game. If I get any more impudence, I’ll hit you ovtr the head.” Caddie: "Righto! I’ll bet yer don't know which is the right club to do it with.”