PROFIT AND LOSS

Evening Star, Issue 20510, 14 June 1930, Page 3

PROFIT AND LOSS

1 Written by Jim Stkoud, for the ‘ Evening Star.’] This is a story of the Dubble-Etfs, who preside over the heterogeneous collection of fruit, vegetables, lollies, and soft drinks in tho magic shop of New Zealand’s most beautiful inland town. It is a wonderful shop, this shop of the Dubble-Effs—crammed, rammed, and jammed to the doors with the most desirable and good-natured edibles imaginable. Big drumtighb cabbages rub shoulders with smart chocolate soldiers ; tomatoes, jujubes, carrots, shallots, and peaches dwell together in perfect harmony. Onions and bananas make comradely excursions into jars of happy caramels; peppermints and cough lozenges play merry hide-and-seek in the mysterious depths of curly greens. The contents of this magic shop seem to bo animated with tho spirit of playfulness and comradeship. The available floor space for customers is about equal to the space available on a workers’ lunch car. Yet Mrs Dubhlo-Eff will serve a dozen customers at once; cabbages to one, peaches to another, chewing gum to another, tomatoes to another, and keep up a running fire of good-natured comment withal.

“Your paper, Mr Brown?” “Yes, just got these plums to-day, Mrs Johnson.” “ All right, Bobby ; tell your mother to call for the strawberries on Monday.” “ Ninepcnco change, Mr Pearson ” “ Cauliflower Yes, I think we have one left.” “ Freezing, I think, Mrs Midget.” “ How is Leslie’s cold, Mrs Collins?” “Just a fresh case of apples in to-day, Mr Nugget.” “Three penn’orth of peppermints?” “ Your tomatoes, Mrs Puddle.” “Table ale? Over in that corner, Mr Hews, Want to take it away? You get thrnppence when you bring the bottle back.” All "this by way of introduction to the story proper, which is short and sweet—as sweet as the lips of a Hudson caramel giri. The Dubble-Effs are loved by everybody in New Zealand’s most beautiful inland town, and simply adored by tho children. It is no unusual sight to see a wee tot, litth bigger than a bottle, parading a dead marine before the Dubble-Effr for the magic thrummer and the Dubhlo-Eff smile. Once upon a time Mrs Duhhle-Eff decided to return the big accumulated store of empty bottles to tho factory, and, with that intent, she arranged them in cases on tho edge of the payement and rang up the carter to call for them. Mrs Dubble-Eff than handed over the reins of government to her worthy spouse and went off duty. She must have forgotten to mention the empty bottle arrangement to Mr Dubble-Eff, for, when she resumed duty again that oveninig her eye rested on shelf upon shelf of empty bottles. “ I can’t think what’s come over the children,” explained Mr Dubble-Eff to his better half as ho met her questioning eye “ I’ve done little else but buy empty bottles all this afternoon. Mrs Dubble-Fff rushed outside. That wretched carter! All that met her gaze was a row of empty cases. 1 Mrs Dubble-Eff laughs heartily when she relates the story of the dead marines. “Tho young scamps!” she says, “to put it over me like that.” Mr Dubble-Eff also regards it as a good joke, aucl considers it by tar tho most precious item on their profit and loss account.