BY THE WAY

Evening Star, Issue 18714, 16 August 1924, Page 2

BY THE WAY

[By Q v.) “The lime has come,.'" the Walrus said, “To talk of many tilings.” Trotsky's emissaries arc in London"just now studying tin* various aspects of ’* peaceful penetration,” the most interesting points to them being twofold. First, howcan wc get a forty million loan from Britain? "Second, how- can we avoid payment of those so-called debts of ours to this brutalised capitalistic nation? There aro other minor points reserved ; but there is another form of peaceful penetration which is being industriously pursued in Russia at tho present time. This is tho aviation scheme worked out on both military and -commercial lines for tho purpose of persuading and emancipating colonics such as those of Britain, Holland, and tho United States. The Soviet authorities are to be congratulated in one re-spect-—that being that they do not work altogether in the dark. Imagination is not unduly strained in figuring their present attitude thus : “We have a largo military and commercial aviation fleet now. In 1925 wo propose to increase this fleet, and -in 1926 we wish to have such fleets as will he adequate to deal with the colonies of the capitalistic Powers, and also with the capitalistic Powers themselves. In the meantime we require from Britain, etc., forty million pounds for internal and external uses.” * -X- * * Professor Worley gave a very Interesting lecture on ‘The Drinks We Drink,’ mentioning, among others, wine and tea. Tea for many years before the Indian trade w-as established was supplied exclusively by the Chinese, although China is not the original homo of the lea plant. Assam, now a British possession, is generally accepted as the place where tea originally grew wild. Some of the older people among us remember John Lane’s scheme for the foundation of a Socialistic colony in Paraguay and Argentina. He called his idea “ Mate-ship,” which is a mpdest and pleasing name. Several ships tooc “mates” of botli sexes to South America, but even before arriving there dissensions arose among the mates. Soon after arrival at their destinations more trouble arose', and it was stated in one Soutb American journal that lea played a not unimportant, part in bringing dissensions to a bead. In those days in .Paraguay, etc., there were, only two kinds of tea—viz., Chinese tea at 5s a pound and “mate” or Paraguay native tea at 2d a pound. Some of the ladv “males” would have nothing but Chinese tea, while others were satisfied with the twopenny variety, thus making worldly possessions a factor in upsetting the Socialistic scheme. The rest is easy: Break-up of the settlements. No further attempts at “maieship,” ■» * -x * Tho Longue of Nations congratulated Professor Perrier, of Neuchatel, who has invented a now international language, Parliamonto, which is simpler and easier to learn than Esperanto.—A. and N;Z. Cable. I lift my bat and wish him well, Good Perrier of Nouohatol; His enterprise must needs compel My honest admiration. I’m willing to admit it would Be most superlatively good To have a language understood By folk of every nation. I own I cannot gather much From hearing Dutchmen talking Dutch Or other foreign lingoes, such As Spaniards talking Spanish; But if some genius were to teach A really universal speech. The difficulties felt by each Would absolutely vanish, And in the coming Golden Age, When Parliaments is the rage, We’ll all be able to engage In amicable chatter With Frenchmen, Russians, Finns, and Lapps, Red Indians, Jugo-Slavs, and Japs, And dodge all dialectic traps, For dialects won’t matter. How simple it will be, just think! To ask a Pole to have a drink, Or talk of Soccer with a Chink,

Or chat about the weather With any reasonable man From Hammerfest or Teheran! You couldn’t have a better plan For bringing folk together. But then my memory brings, worse luck ! Remembrances of Volapuk, That world-wide tongue which got the chuck (Or did oblivion choke it!) Not more than thirty years ago. It seemed a useful thing to know, And lasted for a year or so. But no one ever spoke it. And Esperanto? —Well, I’m told For quite a time it kept its hold, And seemed to bo as good as gold, Both permanent and stable. ’Twas puffed and boosted, goodness knows; But now it’s gone, like last year’s snows, And still we speak the tongues that rose Around the Tower of Babel. No use, good Perrier! Your scheme, However hopeful it may seem, Is merely a delightful dream, A vah'dy-sou'jht objective. Of course, it’s "thrilling to arrange How human nature’s going to change; But mostly (and it’s hardly strange) Arrangements prove defective! -x- a- * * The question of motor traffic is at last being discussed with at least some earnestness. So far the proposals made seem weak, and dictated in a spirit of cornpromise, which is to be deprecated. No one has yet grasped the nettle with a firm and ruthless hand. A few elementary suggestions may not be out of place. As a general proposition it may be laid down that the streets, and in a somewhat lesser degree roads, are primarily for the use and convenience of motorists, who, have also some as yet ill-defined status on pavements anti properties _ adjoining thoroughfares. The. other vehicular traffic has certain reversionary rights,_ mainly dependent on the size and weight ot the vehicle. Without prejudice to these conditions, it is admitted that pedestrians may he permitted to cross from one side ot a street to the other at certain definite places. In such cases the procedure is as followsla! The pedestrian may cross in (he wake of a policeman, judge of the Supreme Court, or lire more pugnacious kind of lawyer, (b) In other cases he is to stand at "attention until he catches the eye of a “well-behaved” motorist. He will then salute, advance two steps, and says “Sir. I fain would cross.” The motorist will reply: “Cross, friend, and look slippy, for 1 am in a hurry.” The foot slogger will then sprint rapidly over the intervening space, and on arrival hold a short thanksgiving service. If regulations framed in this spirit were introduced and rigorously enforced, the streets would be once more safe for democracy.

# * * # The Medical Board (it is to be known ' as the Medical Council in future) seeks greater powers over the profession, and it is likely to get them. Tire board is composed of medical men, and set a.—— (Mo, that won’t do. That is the broad and easy way to an appointment with a Supremo Court judge to discuss the law of libel.) Tho council then desires authority to investigate charges of “ grave impropriety or infamous professional conduct.” It is staggering to think that the grave and reverend gentlemen who invite you to put out your tongue, examine it with aversion, and remark ” Hm,’’ could possibly commit such crimes. It is, however, difficult to say what would be considered grave impropriety or infamous professional conduct. In the sister profession of the law these things arc generally understood to imply accepting less than full union rales; but doctors as a class are singularly generous in their financial relations with their patients. No other profession, trade, or calling habitually adjusts its charges to the purse of its clients. Let the point pass. The M.D. convicted on one or other of these counts may he lined up to £SO nr i suspended fur twelve montlia. But mark

how the unregistered practitioner is dealt with. Ho is liable to be fined £IOO, with <i continuous penalty o£ £2OO a day, pro-, snmably bo long as he pursues his evil course.' Hence it appears that it is twice as culpable to be unregistered as to indulge in infamous professional conduct. Tbd council may bo right, but one would likd more information regarding the infamoui conduct valued at £6O. -x- •» * # The reason is somewhat obscure why a 1 priest (Father Degen, of Leicestershire) should consider himself endowed with sufficient knowledge and authority to advise bridegrooms as to tactful treatment of their wives. Perhaps the explanation is that the less experience one has the more qualified to offer expert advice. The worthy father suggests that the code of rules drawn up. by himself (or similar.ones) should bo hung . conveniently near the shaving mirror. Not ■ a bad idea I _ Interest in conning them and ■ deciding which he, will be sale in breaking | may displace the usual strong language i when the shaver inadvertently cuts himself. Why not a list of rules for brides by a religieuse, which might contain the following:— Don’t nag. Remember that a man prefers a ding-dong fight to constant nagging. Don’t meet him on the doors!ep with a ! woeful face and a lengthy catalogue of Mary Jane’s peccadilloes. Keep those to I relate between the hands at bridge. Don’t expect him to bo angelic over a badly-cooked dinner. Kisses v.on't satisfy an empty stomach.

Though "he likes his wife to bo admired by other men he doesn’t expect her to exhibit pleasure in the fact Don’t expect him to be continually declaring ho loves you. Take it for granted], and don’t bo mawkish.

Don’t ask him for money when he is hungry. Feed him well; then administer a little judicious flattery, and out comes tho cheque book. If your intellect is superior to your husband's, don’t on any account let”him discover that you know it. Don’t rub the powder off your face on to his coat sleeve. Most men bate 'powder, especially on their lips! Above all, never bore him. A man can forgive a flighty, a bad-tempered, even au erring wile, but a boring one—never;'