POSTSCRIPTS

Evening Post, Volume CXL, Issue 148, 20 December 1945, Page 6

POSTSCRIPTS

Chronicle and Comment

BY PERCY FLAGE

When Marshal Vassilevsky reached/ Hsinking, capital of Manchuria, he arrested pathetic "King" Henry Pu-Yi, who lost his second throne. He seems to be sinking, too. * * « , Leaders of the Ku . Klux Klan in America are planning a "national antiJewish Party," which may nominate a Presidential candidate in the 1948 election.. | * * * Over 700 bottles of champagne at 400 francs a bottle and 2300 glasses of brandy are consumed nightly at one Paris night club by American servicemen. *. * * SURE TEST. "A.8.C." writes: "Flage, my wife is an intellectual. If she laughs at one of my funny stories I can be sure that it is a good yarn. What do you think?" ~ , Probably that you have a livelywife, brother. 1 # » ♦ TERSE. In Kansas, a circular letter advertising flour observed: "The Lord's Prayer was written in 71 words; the first chapter of Genesis in 800; the Gettysburg Address in 267; but the Office of Price Administration uses 2500 .words to announce a reduction in the price of cabbage seed." * * * SHORT POEM. Dear sir,—Could you or one of your readers be good enough to give me the name of the author of the short poem beginning "Fair these bright meads," and finishing "And we in dreams behold the Hebrides." T.M. Does any reader know that name? * * ' * RUDE SHOCK. A tourist visited historic Kona on the island of Hawaii. Fired by romantic tales, he felt sure he had reached a land where nothing savouring of western civilisation would be permitted to disturb the tropical atmosphere. When he reached a small village by' the seashore he became interested in a tame mynah bird displayed by a picturesque Hawaiian maid. But he was due for a rude shock. "What's the bird's name?" he inquired. "Rita Hayworth." * # * DRUNKEN SAILORS. Service officers and civilians are alarmed at the extent of drunkenness among Royal Navy personnel in Hong Kong. . . They say that it is necessary now more than ever to create a good impression among the Chinese. Regularly between 5 p.m. and 7 p.m. drunken sailors can be seen being halfcarried and half-dragged unconscious along the streets towards Queen's Pier. Hordes of screaming Chinese children follow them, fighting for the money that drops from their pockets. Naval patrols are conspicuous by their abSGTICG Although there seem to be, ample supplies of the best liquors, the prices are prohibitive, so the sailors drink shamshui (Chinese rice win). * * * "FOREIGN" DANCING. Members of Ireland's Gaelic League, backbone of the Nationalist movement for half a century, are allowed now to dance the fox-trot, rumba, or any other dance of non-Irish origin. No longer will members risk banishment by the league for mere attendance as spectators at "foreign" dances. The annual convention held in Dublin was forced either to expel Mr. de Valera or to change the "foreign" dance rule. It decided to retain Mr. de Valera s membership. „„. , A month or bo ago Mr. de Valera, with 4000 others, attended an Eire army benevolent fund ball in Dublin, where most of the dances were "modern. Although Mr. de Valera did not participate in the dancing, Left Wing members of the league demanded his ejection from the organisation. lhe convention adopted new rules forbidding members from "practising or encouraging foreign dances within the league, but allowing complete freedom outside the league. • * * * THE LITTLE GHOST. "It is feared that eight or ten mil* lions may die of starvation in Europe this winter."—From an UNRRA report. I drive him daily from my door, A little ghost—he never cries Only the horror of his eyes Destroys my peace for ever more. I. drive him out. yet in he'll creep At night beside my bed he stands Touching with tiny frozen hands My coverlid. I may not sleep. At meals he stands beside my seat, He watches the lull dishes pass. He watches everything I eat; He gnaws a little bit of grass. Oh, little one! Oh, little one! Small unit of that, mighty host, You haunt my plenty with youl ghost , „ , For all that I have-left undone! MARJORIE ADAMS.

RARE FOSSILS. Fossils which reveal for the first time the long extinct fauna of Southern Rhodesia have been discovered by an officer of the colony's geological survey, A. M. Macgregor, while he was surveying the coal deposits m the Sebungue area. . In the beds of two ancient lakes he found the fossilised remains of reptiles, fish, and crustaceans which occupied that area millions of years ago. Because of the country's geological structure fossils are rare and only small-scale discoveries have previously been made, but the discovery of this new site, where there are tons of remains waiting to be excavated, may enable the natural historians to gain a more complete picture of Rhodesia s former inhabitants. Final identification of these fossils will need N specialised assistance, but already many of the former animals of Rhodesia have been identified, among them the Dinocephalus Viearful head"), a fraction of whose skull weighs more than 301b and stands two feet high.

THERE WERE GIANTS

Geologists will tell you that the Giant's Causeway was caused by natural forces operating in a natural way. Which is ridiculous, says J.F. - Every true believer knows that the causeway is the work of the giants themselves— or the work of one giant. , There was an Irish giant and a Scottish giant, and they amused themselves hurling insults back and forth across the Irish Sea, until the Scottish giant could stand it no longer and announced his intention of coming over to deal with the Irishman in person. He came, building his road, ahead of him by hurling great pieces of basalt for stepping-stones. His size and apparent ferocity paralysed the Irishman, who was nigh dead with fright when his wife came to his rescue. Hurriedly she dressed him in long-clothes, tucked him in bed, and sat down beside him to await the coming of the Scottish man. In due course he arrived and stormed into the bothy, to be greeted by the woman with her finger to her lips. "Hush," she said, sternly. "YeTl wake the baby, ye gommeril, ye! "Baby!" said the Scottish man, peering at the huge figure in the bed. "Baby! Is that the baby? Losh! What size must the father be!"

Terror-stricken, he rushed back the way he had come, tearing up the stepping-stones behind him. .One bit he left on the Irish shore—the bit. \v,e call the Giant's Causeway.

If unbelievers sneer at this story, point out that there were giants in those days. There was Og, King of Bashan, He is said to have lived 3000 years, and after his death one of his bones was used to make a bridge across a river.