"THE STAIRS OF SIGHS"

Evening Post, Volume CVII, Issue 36, 14 February 1929, Page 13

"THE STAIRS OF SIGHS"

SOME POINTED NOTICES

WRITINGS ON A WALL

There are in Wellington comparatively few big buildings without elevators. Those that have none aro not exactly popular with employees and callers accustomed to travelling in a quick-mov-ing lift. Like many other modern conveniences, they have tended to make people feel tired when confronted with several flights of stairs and no lift. In tho city there is ono building whero tho absence of a lift has led to somo pointed remarks being written on the whito-plastcred walls up tho stairway. It ■is . the polico building—the southern portion—in Johnston street. The ground and first floors aro occupied by polico officers; on tho second, floor thoro is tho Kaihvay Land Office, and on the top floor the "Valuation Department.

A caller going to tho Valuation Dopartment is facod, soon after ho commences to climb tho stairs, with this notice: "Valuation Department, upstairs, top iloor." It is tho "upstairs, top floor" part that is annoying, no doubt.

But callers and others have registered their annoyance very pointedly on the walls. There aro piquant lines all the way uj> to tho top iloor. They start something like this: "Get a lift—two of 'em." "Mem Gott, voro vos dot lift?" "Valuation Dopartment, top iloor, tako lift." "Lift for sale cheap." "Where is the lift'!" Then there is a notico which suggests a very tired feeling: "Won't you got a lift, please; any old lift will do." Further up there are more poetic lines, with apologies to the writer of the "Prisoner's Song," such as "If I Had tho Wings of an Angel up these Stairs I Would Fly."

Perhaps the gem of the lot, though, is tho following:—Polieo Notice. Any person found expiring on these stairs is Mablo to v flno not exceeding £.50. — Signed, Superintendent Police, Weir lington." Among the other notices are: "Matthew, Mark, Luke, and John, hold the lift while I jump on," "Wanted, sell, lift, in good order. Apply ——, 'Evening Post.' " "Everything conies to him who waits, but don't wait for tho lift because there isn't any." "Why join tho harriers if you can run up and down to the Valuation Department?" "The stairs of sighs." "Keep fit by. using these stairs regularly," and "In loving memory of , who passed away on tliu 999 th stair."