THE CHANGING SCENE.

Dominion, Volume 3, Issue 799, 23 April 1910, Page 6

THE CHANGING SCENE.

; ; A BIRD'S-EYE VIEW.

7 (Bγ M.GK.)

-j: The fact' that Mr. Wilford intends !to resign ithe Chairmanship of Commit: /tees if elected Mayor has led some illnatured, people to suggest that' he places. the. interests of the city above 'the interests of.the nation. "Fancy," .they say, "placing the nation second." This is quite, a mistake, however. Mr. ■Wilford places the interests of the city second. The interests of the; nation only come.third .with Him;;

.'■.';.' ''Amongst t&o many enterprising folk who love astronomy, and feel curious about the visiting comet," says a contemporary, is Sir Joseph Ward,' who tfosethe other morning "at 8 a.in'.tolook ; at '.the wondrous luminary." Although Sir Joseph has made no statement for ■■'.- publication, .it is .understood that' he as thoroughly convinced that.lie comet 'is. only a temporary visitor, and is in . no way due to the climate, which is in */thoroughly sound condition. A great ■ many foolish people, he said, in the course of a speech, which he delivered ■ after thoroughly' inspecting the rare visitor, were saying that the bottom / twas going ; .to\ fall out. of the country 1 at. an early date; These things weiw always said when comets appeared. Per- ...' sonally, he; had no time for croakers,: ; and-he felt that it was. the duty of every patriotio citizen to combine against'•. those w ho would destroy the credit of the country.! It was as . reasonable to blame the. Government for th* comet as lo,say that the Min- , istry was responsible for the .Paris floods, and. in any event he would stako Ihis political: existence on his prediction; ythat by : the date ,of : its -next , eppearance people, would forget . that - the ...-cornet had ever arrived. Hβ had had some figures prepared which showed conclusively that (±he comet had greatly decreased in size ■and: in destructive power since the Go- ■ fverriment took office.. He was oonfi.iident. that a.'wise policy of "progress, tempered by prudence, would ; have the ■result of bringing about a position 5a which he would be able to .say that the comet would be a negligible quantity.- In private .conversation Sir JoMseph has explained that it is the duty <of. Ministers to make themselves aciquainted with the "phenomena of "the Ih'eavens, and whatever, his opponents (might. say- he wa-s.' det«rminod to. invesItigate personally -all comets, eclipses, >nd : other celestial aberrations. ' ' Minjiflterß did not blow trumpets' every .'time'.they', did, something, and peopleen! that/account were apt to think they jdid:,nothing. ; As a. matter of fact.the iGoTemment had for a long time been preparing for the comet,;and had, sne- : teaied, by shifting theceatreof gravity, Jan slightly varying the earth's orbit. (33ria.-was the true explanation, of the Barge quantity of. railway lines.and enpines and porters and railway stations established in the South Island. '

'- "Sawn," said Mr. ; Dooley, "these, Jhsre-, Crairiordites Smakes me: tired. JThey're asMn'; not:, that Crawfoitl shud be' elicted, but why Tom shud. 03ns ,morrbid spirit iv inquisitiveness is , ia bad sign.' In Hi' good ould days, no■body.wud ask why Tom shud be elicted. not throuble t' ask t , be elicted. *Th'. : Prime Ministher wud say, 'Tom's ime Qiat-yvnid: settle , it. But kow'dayS'ih' publio:;Keeps sayin'Whyf fiWiencef. mereforeS WherebyP" -, . ''Wei," eaid Mr. Hennessy, "Why Sshnd he be elicted?"

' "Because, Jawn, ~he wants t , be. ftadies, , he say,,'an' gintlemen, I seek iyere support on a gronn' that is, now Bn'- fresh; I'm not wan iv th' ould-, fashioned style that -wants t' deceive ye into believin , that I am a reluctant martyr tf me fierce convictioas on th , jubjec'iv wood-hlocks. I'll be honest with ■ye,V-he Bays, say, f; avoid 6nthai th' thrama: is Botbirr , to' me. Vr iV necessity .iv rjvidin , stairiights Pr blind lodgers caie not wan chainnanship iv, oomanity. Nor,' he says; *wiH I descend t' $h' low method iv capturin , th , um-ibrd!a-aiakßrs J vote be ondthertakin , ■ t , provide a moist.cKmata. A plain man,' ho says, '1 spake t , plain min. I come mot .as a suppliant, butas; a wud-be Sjenefaethor. l> ask,- not that ye confer Hh' Mayoral chair on me, bnt that y , jallow. met , confer mesilf on the city; , lAn' thin a heckler gets up, an' wante i? know Tom's views on thramwaya. ''Well,' says Tom, ■touching thrams, I ihave only f. Bay that if ye saw me with Pth , Mayoral chain on, ye wad hasien- 1' elict me. Anny more No more qtristions boin , forthoomin', Tom •explains that whin he wuz a boy they aaidhe V get on. Th' wnrrld,' >he saya, 'is a laddher. I ask nothin' Ini wan rung. Think,' he says, an , |th', tears roll 'down his cheeks, 'think ar what ye will'do if ye fail t' give me s leg up. -I set me hearrt long ago on bein' yere Mayor. The motives is simple m they are honest. I promise ye no airy fairy.dhreaihs. I will not ondhertake f run th' city without collectin' rates. At th , end iv my temn thtown will look nroch th' same as usual;, (All I want is f roun' off me career, t' fulfil mo destiny.' An' afther this, appeal, Jawn, I say it with shame, there's Borne narref-minded omadhauns who Btill ask why. Be hivins, Jawn; / th' time's comin' whin they won't elict ye Mayor onless ye give a good reason. The 1 Crawfordites are biassed. Tom gets ap an says, 'Y' all know me)' an' th' Crawfordites applaud and cheer."

"Do they all know Tom?" asked Mr. Eennessy. ■, -■ . .'v ,' ..

"Well, tii' other eide ie afraid they don't." ■ . '■.-.■- -. ~.'■. :

In the caso of tho .Countess ,Tarnowska, charged in conjunction with others with the murder of Count Kamarowsky at Venice, several mental experts gave evidence that the. Countess's physical condition and hysteria were due to the abuse of drugs.- They contended'that •frequently witnessing suicides and jhomicides had .so influenced her that the clause of the penal code regarding diminished responsibility was applicable to her case.—Casle item. '■-. ■ ■ ;; i

J .was once a pretty, simple little maiden with a dimple, '■■.'. ' ■■■ Jest an innocent, domestic little Uary Ann; ■•".'■. { '3 would blush from head to' feet every : time I chanced ito meet -.., . My exceedingly adorable Hungarian. ZSwas tbe mildest of Tomancee. but my matrimonial fancies. , ■■•.-. ■ In a'lnoaner most remarkable ho blow ' aside,' . • . Por one morning, when I' met him, he declared I mieht forgot him. . ■ And, without another word, committed ■suicide. .-■•',-S.-. , ... . . . „ Having lost my yonng compomreat this' •■•■ terrible disclosure • Of my charm, I sought a, lover of ■stolidity, .••■■•. ■ And had gained ; my earlier .bnoyancy when, much to my annoyance, ho ' Behaved like number one with, great rapidity. ... If I chanced to go a-shoDping there would be a constant poppine Of revolvers, and I wept at my ability To promote assassination through my fearful fascination, • ''. ■ ': And my path was- simply choked with slaia nobility.

When tho casual nassine stranEere, all unconscious of their dancers. Saw me pass, and very coolly-craned their nocks to see, They would be no longer placid, but would rish for prussic acid To the chemist, and expire: in awfnl ecstasy. Now I fear tho.chance is slender that I'll ■ ' over know the tender Homely pleasures of a calm connubiality: While I ilream of-coolung, maybe, or the bathing of tho baby. . I am swelling the statistics of mortality.

."I see," said tho barber, .'that the Premier says the trains' in , Hearen isn't any better'n.ours. Leastways, 'e says that, if they are bettor. VU take ,a season ticket when ho gets there. Carryin' patriotism too far?. That don't worry me. That's the parsons', affair. But whether Heaven is better or not, we gotte'r go there—there or "elsewhere. What I want to know is where I come in. I've been taken down —livin' pretty straight and all that, puttin'-iip with a lot of things, generally- worried, and business bloomin'. slack 'a'rf' the time since the safety .'razor came in; - And I've not growled—much. For I pictured meself ; 'on a nice little bit of, a farm up above —I never believed them yarns of wings and gold and singing 'ynms— and a ;E')od, climate and,a mild winter and- good roads and trains and not too much to do. . And now the": Premier says we better look out for' disappointment. Wot's- the good of being a straight goer, and endurin' things, n-hen tho Better Land ain't no more a Detter land than Nbo South"' Wales? ' ,1 near cry when.l think of the.sprats I've put in.the plato and the sermons I listened to when I might 'are been lookin' after;me cabbages;", ■■' '

"But perhaps Sir Joseph' "was not serious?" , . •*•'■■

. "Praps.: 'A bloke was'in this rnoruin'-, and I told: 'im \v'6t' I 'told you,, and 'e said. w'en, the -patriotic Noo i Zealander. dies Vll 'ave" a''fuhny time. One of them, 'e said, told 'is experiences at a seance the other night. It appears 'o 'ad a good look at the station at the gate of the noo world, was pleased to find it was not so terrible fine asi 'e expected, and 'e swelled with a bit of pride, you see. The train 'e was on was a fast one, and 'e looked out of the .winder and said to' the . shadowy form guiding him, 'Well, it's iiot' such bad scenery.-But y' oughter see Wanganui.'; And w'en 'e got "out at the terminus 'e 'ad alook round 'im.. 'Xof bad,' 'e says, 'but Eotorua's near as" good.' And finally, '■ as the ■'■ train was startin' back, 'e says to the shadowy form, • 'Eaven's all rig'lit, but' on tho whole 1 think' Noo bit better.'' The shadow smiled. .'Look,' 'o said, 'at the name on the station. This was tho down express you came on-. . Thank you, sir. Next, please." . : .