The problems of fostering a sexually abused child

Press, 24 July 1986, Page 4

The problems of fostering a sexually abused child

pA Wellington Considerable problems are faced in fostering a sexually abused child, a seminar hosted by the Hutt Valley Foster Care Association has been told.

A guest speaker, Ms Emily Jean McFadden, of Eastern Michigan University in the United States, said that in many instances foster parents were not aware the child in their care had been sexually abused. Understanding of the child’s behavioural problems and responses was therefore lacking.

A child abused by their own parents or by previous foster parents tended to expect the same treatment from their new foster parents. Sexual overtures to the foster parent from the child might come as a nasty surprise, Ms McFadden said.

Foster parents needed to be aware of their child’s history of sexual abuse. They needed to know what was done, where, what words were used and what the child’s rewards were, she said. Only through being aware could they help the child time to terms with a new non-sexual parental relationship, and protect themselves from mis-in-terpretation of their actions.

Studies had shown that unexpected sexual advances by a foster child often caused a parent to respond differently from what he or she would ever consider doing to their own child.

The incest taboo was lacking, Ms McFadden said, and the sexually abused child risked being sexually abused again. A foster parent might, however, respond instead with severe disciplinary measures, which could lead to physical or emotional abuse.

Sexually abused children were often emotion-

ally needy and should receive treatment, she said. The foster parents should work closely with the therapist It needed to recognised also that a girl sexually abused when she was eight might with therapy, resolve the situation at an eight-year-old level. Further therapy might be needed when she reached puberty, because she might have very severe reactions to menstruation and believe she had been terribly damaged, Ms McFadden said.

The girl needed to achieve a new level of understanding of her abuse and her sexuality, and might need help

again when she married. Recent United States studies had shown one in four girls and one in six boys were sexually abused. With more studies and prevention programmes Ms McFadden believed it would probably be found that boys and girls were equally abused.

Boys were often reluctant to speak out, but many suffered severe doubts about their maleness if they had been sexually abused by either a male or female, Ms McFadden said.

They needed to be assured they were male and not “a girl” or “gay” simply because they were abused.