Parents have ‘role to play’

Press, 4 January 1980, Page 4

Parents have ‘role to play’

Parents should take a good .look at the problems of their children because nine times out .of 10 they can help, says a visiting author. John Cheetham is coauthor of a new book, “Parent Power,” which looks at changes in society and education, and appraises the ability of parents to cope with them.

what they have read to their particular environment. Mr Cheetham said that he had been attacked by a woman with an umbrella because during a speech he would not say whether he thought marijuana should be legalised. He told her to make her own decision. He said that he was not “anti” anything, but he did not like drug dependency. “Many parents believe that drug-pushers are people, in dark blue suits and darkl

Interviewed in Christchurch yesterday,-Mr Cheetham said that many parents were aware that their children were having problems with drugs, school, or the police, but they were afraid to step in and discuss the problem and try to help. They were scared of losing their children’s love and respect, and of the neighbours finding out. Mr Cheetham, who is a trained psychologist and high school teacher in Melbourne, worked on prevention programmes at the Victorian Foundation on Alcoholism and Drug Dependency in Melbourne for three years and in that time counselled more than 1200 families. He is in New Zealand to visit friends and to promote hiS book, which has just been released here. His coauthor is Brian Costello, a Melbourne psychologist. The biggest criticism of the book had been from parents who say that it is too open-ended. They did not like it because it did not tell them what they should do and what they should not do, said Mr Cheetham. Instead, the book presents problems and some of their possible causes and solutions and asks parents to apply

• glasses lurking round the to solving the problem was corner .They also think that minimal against that of pro- ; as an adult they are entitled fessionals. .to drink but strongly object The main thing parents to their children’s smoking had to watch for was deceit, pot,” said Mr Cheetham. He When they saw it, they had sees his job not to reinforce to have the confidence to those ideas and attitudes but admit that their children to get parents to ask why were doing something they their children are doing did not want to talk about. th i ngs If they could not cope with After three years working it themselves, they had to be with families, Mr Cheetham s rav g enough to admit that said the self-consciousness •of parents stood out. They the y could not manage, and Ifelt that their contribution ask for help.