TEN LITTLE MEGATONS

Press, Volume CII, Issue 30206, 10 August 1963, Page 10

TEN LITTLE MEGATONS

(By

WHIM WHAM]

Disasters give no warning.—Sir Leon Goto, Minister of Civil Defence. Foreword to Householders’ Handbook for Emergencies (Postage Paid.) Given timely warning, one of the best measures for selfpreservation is to leave a Uireatened area.—Householders' Handbook for Emergencies. It is important to remain under cover until you are officially advised that it is safe to emerge.—op. cit. Sir, have You had your Copy of Sir Leon Gotz’s Masterpiece—? The Plain Man’s How-to-Stay-Alive And popular Disasterpiece? He’s printed It in Black and Red, The Pages number Twenty-two. In case of Earthquake, Flood or Fire. It tells You simply What to do. Four Pages on the Nuclear Bomb, But “not in Detail.” warns Sir L. This dreadful Subject doesn’t lend Itself to Detail very welL Here’s Information, of a Sort, Most conscientiously imparted. I’ve read It, and I feel as wise Or well-prepared as when 1 started. Bid me DISPERSE, and I’ll DISPERSE—

Should TIMELY WARNING sound ! Since I’m not urged to build Myself A SHELTER underground. The safest Place to be is just Not There, when IT arrives— A BASEMENT, on the other Hand (Well SANDBAGGED) may save Lives. Though You survive, whole Suburbs may Be blasted with the Earth’s own Crust off— Keep SOAP AND WATER handy, then. To wash THEIR radioactive Dust off. Sir. I’m not cynical ! I blush For the departmental. Ministerial Authors of FALL-OUT (Postage Paid) That seems to Me such DENSE MATERIAL. With Pictures, too ! Page Twenty-two, That schoolboy Sketch of something ON fire— If THAT’S ten Megatons of Doom, Hell’s Nothing but a Guy Fawkes Bonfire 1