SHOULD WOMEN PROPOSF?

Press, Volume LXIII, Issue 12897, 31 August 1907, Page 7

SHOULD WOMEN PROPOSF?

"Tho idea!" said Mrs Belle De Rivera (president of tho New York City Federation of Women's Clubs), addressing the Daughters of Ohio, "that women should not propose if they want to! Many girls nr© taught that tho only sphere in life for them is a home and a husband. If a girl is brought up to believe that she must marry, she should have the opportunity to get a husband. It is like teaching a boy a trade and not permitting him to practice it. I should like to ask," remarked Mrs De Rivera, "how is a girl going to marry if she is not given & chance? If she trios to make an opportunity she is considered unworthy, unmaidenly, and no good. It should not be this way at all. It is high time for a chance in the order of things."

Many Ohio women, prominent in social and club life, when asked for their opinion, sanctioned Mrs De Rivera's opinions. "Yos; I think it is properly proper for certain women to propose," agreed _Irs Dore Lyon, president of tho exclusive Eclectic Club. "For example," said Mrs Lyon, "in the case of a rich young woman. Perhaps a young man has been paying her attention for some time, and she has grown fond of him. without a formal declaration on his part. She might say to him, 'Now v my dear, if you would care to marry mc, I will obtain your parents' consent. I am able to support you in the style your tastes require, and you need not worry about a bank account.' Or," added Mrs Lyon, "take the case of a professional young woman, who has a good income from her work. She might say to the young man of her choice, who has not come to the proposing stage, 'My dear, I think we would be very happy together. I am quite able to take care of two, and could support a husband very nicely.' "The act of proposing," said Mrs Lyon, "carries with it the offer to take care of the young woman whose hand he asks for. There is an underlying economio motive in such proposals. Then, why should'this not carry in the case of the young woman that proposes. Th© only girl who has no right to proposo is the indolent, unskilled young woman, with no visible means of support. She has no right to ask a man to marry her to support her."^ "Of course women should propose,' said Mrs Harriet Johnston Wood, attorney and president of tlhe Business Women's Club. "This privilege is simply another self-imposed right of men, which women are tryinz to free themselves of. Of course, the right, like every other right that men have had to gradually surrender up to women on demand, will nox be given over without a lot of fuss, but it will oomo. This old ou6tom of man's exclusive right to ask women to marry him will in time be battered down • like many others. However, I don't believe a change in the custom of proposing would increase the number of marriages very much. The majority of women who do not marry to-day prefer to stay single from choice, because they probably have not met just th« nghl •nan." . ~,__,. " I don't believe in radical methods of change," said Miss Mary Garrett Hay, leader of the suffrage movement, "hut there is no doubt but that toi9 custom will change sooner or later ot its own volition. Certainly, women should have this privilege given them, for there Should be equal rights in everything between man and woman. However, I don't know of any woman hankering after matrimony, and I don't believe it would make much difference in the number of marriages # "Women are more self-sufficient unto their own happiness nowadays, and w« don't hear of such cases we read about in works of older authors, where women grew pale, pined away for love, or met a tragic ending, a la Romeo andJuhet No; times have changed, and there is every reason to believe that they wiu continue to chango for woman s increased independence in all matters where she is concerned." "I don't see why women should not propose," said Dr. Henry Marsh Nvarren. tho "marrying parson." "I see no good reason why tjiey should not have this same privilege with men. it is perfectly proper for a young woman to ask a man's intentions after he nas been paying her attention for some time. fehe oould enquire diplomatically, with the great financier. 'Where do I standP' If th© young man had' no intentions of marrying her for any reason, then he should not expect to enioy her society to the exclusion of others. Girls who permit this find themselves merging into spinsterfioou before they realiso it. when, of course, their chances of matrimony grow less. No; I think girls should share equal privilege with men in proposing. There is no reason, unless it be custom, that prevents them."