RANDOM SHOTS

Auckland Star, Volume XLIX, Issue 41, 16 February 1918, Page 14

RANDOM SHOTS

Some write a neighbour's name to lash. Some write—vain thought—lor needful casn. Some write to please the country clash And raise a din; For mc, an aim I never fash, I write for fun.

BY ZAMIL

"To make the world safe for Democ- i Tacy" ie one of the powerful reasons advanced by Dr. Woodrow Wilson for America's entrance into the world-war. { Very good indeed; a noble incentive, c truly, for the people of the freest nation'j on earth—the most "triumphant democ- J racy" yet witnessed. But "Zamiel" — along with some other people whose vo- 1, cation is not "fun":—is beginning to in- j quire, "Who or what .will i::ake and '• keep the world safe from Democracy"? ' It is evident that the ideal state of things is not wrapped up in that blessed word Democracy. An Italian poet has j declared that "the people is a beast pfL muddy brain"; and, certainly, the doings j and sayings of the Bolshevik element in ' Russia —the representatives of the most advanced Socialistic ideals— : are not cal- j L'ulated to inspire us with confidence in . the governing capacity of the people. But the craze for democratic control seems destined to become general. Austria and Germany have shown symptoms of awaking, and oven in neutral countries like Switzerland and Denmark, the |' poople are becoming restive under the j' proved incompetence of their Governments to feed them. Revolution is in i the air everywhere—except, happily, in j< the British Empire. Long may Britain I I stand, the ccnblcm of stability in a .world ■shaken by agitations! By this steadfastness will she succeed —in other words. "It's dosppd as docs it!" In the 1 meantime, the frightful excesses of the I Russian revolutionaries make one trem- ! Mc for the future, if the whole enrth j should come under the reipjn of an untutored and uncontrolled Democracy. ' "We must educate our masters," say 'some. Education would undoubtedly) I save us: but the procefe is slow, and I tho forces of revolution are alarmingly, rapid in their movements. So here 1 I must leave the problem of how to make and keep the world safe. It is too vast a question for mc to tackle. It is comforting to observe how calm, and confident the British people are, despite privations, air raids, war losses, i enemy plots abroad, and political strife at home. The injudicious letter of Lord j Lansdowno was at one time looked upon las likely to cause division and mischief; but it " proved less than a nine days' wonder, and the nation quietly accepted it for what it really was —an instance ,of British individualism and an exemplifii cation of the nation's unquenchable love of freedom of speech. But, while it lusted. I the feeling aroused was intense. It is ) related that in one of the political clubs of London a noble peer in loud tones I denounced his former leader as "a damned traitor." Just free speech again —and nobody was a. penny thu worse. *±£iii±±ii All the good that thu war has done and is doing for us will not, of course, :be fully known for some time; but by I way of* instalment some benefits may be ! noted. 1 rend in the London papers that j the Browning Society has ceased to exist, liintl the (Jirtuii (Jirls'" College brunch even I wont sc> far as to authorise the spending of funds on hand in the acquisition of [chocolates. Sensible girls! Chocolates I are mush more nourishing these days I than disquisitions on the possible meanling of the verbal riddles set by the I deceased Robert Browning. Again. I learn, the ladies of Boston, the centre of i American cultuie. have wound up their i Bcrgson Society, and are devoting themselves to the useful task of "sewing socks for soldiers." But there is still a Bronte Society in England; and for our sins I suppose the war must go on still longer. The laiest effort of tho Bronte enthusiasts is a defence of the strong language put into the mouths of characters in "'Wutheving Heights." Here are some of the exclamations, printed in full, to the horror of mid-Victorian prudes — "Hell!" "Damn the Curate!" "Hellish Villain!" This only confirms the view that women novelists and women poets are frequently more candid and realistic* than mere male authors. It is pointed | out as notable that, though R. L. Stevenson has many pirates and other ruffians in his books, h« never reports a "swear word" from their lips. Among curious facts brought into notice by the British capture of Jerusalem, the following are worthy of mention: —There are five potentates now on earth who claim the title of "King ol Jerusalem." These are: Tho Sultan of Turkey, Hie Holiness the Pope, the Emperor of Austria, the King of Spain, and ex-King Manoe! of Portugal. Should thu title br> revived, it is highly unlikely that either of these personages will bear it. Another interesting fact is that when Jacob died in Egypt "Joseph commanded his servants the physicians to embalm hie father: and the embalmed Wael." Joeeph took the body to the Holy Land, and it wae buried in the Cave of Maehpelah, with the bodies of. I his forefather-.. Mow that thn cave fe! ■ in British hnnd3 there is 6ome likelihood that llio body of Jacob ma}- be examined, with the inscriptions on his mummyease; for bodies embalmed in the Egyptian manner have been preserved from much earlier datee than the time of the Exod'ue. ±i-*1±4444* ', A borough engineer in England com- ;: plains publicly of the waste of paper •by certain Government Departments, , I while other departments are urging ecoi ! nomy in ivery direction—even to the (j collection of waste-paper. The engineer ■ I wanted 100 tons of stone, and applied ■to the Road Stone Control. In reply he f j received a book of application forms, ■ measuring 15 inches by !i inches and conI! taining 26 full-page forms In triplicate— 1 ' 75' forms in all. He also received a 17-page I J pamphlet of instructions. This sort of i I thing goes on merrily in New Zealand 3 also. The other day a Government Dβ- ! partment in Auckland advertised for a, j I man at 70/ a week, and got 247 appli- . cations in writing. Instead of allow--1 ing the hetid of the department here to i choose a man, headquarters rules dei manded that he should write to each 3 applicant; then interview each; then J fill up 247 forms with details, of each 5 applicant's career from birth, with par--1 ticulars as to his henlth, qualifications, 5 education, and so forth; then send the t 247 letters and forms to Wellington, and t sit down and wait for a month or so for f the selection to be made. Verily, the r wisdom with which the world -is gov--1 erned remains an undiscoverable quantity t