THINGS I WOULD LIKE TO HAVE IN THE ARMY
1. Phone number of any movie actress named Lana Turner. 2. Whole cookies or cake from home. 3. Fifteen day furlough starting tomorrow. 4. Three day pass when I get back. 4. Quarters and rations for my girl friends. 6. Free beer in the Canteens. 7. A longer rest between gun drills. Preferably six months. 8. Something you ask for in the canteen. 9. Four pay-days a month. 10. A way out. . 11. Shoes that never need a shine. 12. An egg that looks like it came from a chicken. * * * Pretty-legged girls who encase same in slacks, I’d condemn to life term in the Waacs ! TO A NON-COM I KNOW The Romans had a word for you Three words, I should say, No single word could comprehend, A Noncom, anyway. They are, NON COMpos mentis, Words which quite embrace The things you —nuts, insane, A psychopathic case. The Sergeant slays his cringing brood With curses lurid, crisp and crude, The Colonel’s equally emphatic, ' But uses swear words most grammatic.
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Bibliographic details
Flak, Volume 1, Issue 8, 25 June 1943, Page 2
Word Count
178THINGS I WOULD LIKE TO HAVE IN THE ARMY Flak, Volume 1, Issue 8, 25 June 1943, Page 2
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