Morals and Manners

Flak, Volume 1, Issue 5, 14 May 1943, Page 6

Morals and Manners

Highlight of the week at one Troop H.Q. of the 66th is the opening of a campaign for “Better Manners.”

A certain gunner felt that the slogan should be extended to include: “...and Better Morals,” but since everyone felt that theirs were above question, by a majority vote the motion was defeated at a recent lunchhour stop-work meeting.

Our hard-baked sergeant opened the proceedings by reciting that useful little word that describes the place where the water ain’t these days.- Penalty, one penny. The managing committee have drawn up a set of rules to ensure a regular return of profits for the swear-box.

Substitutes may be used where the situation demands an increased vocabulary, but words with a double meaning are charged for at the rate of 3d. per meaning. If the accused can prove to the - committee’s satisfaction that no additional -meanings were implied, the accusers are fined Id, each for having bad minds.

Chief difficulty is small change. One Waac (with a brother in the life-guards) complains that because she had only 3d. to Offer for a penny fine, the committee decided that it would be necessary for her to swear twice more to get'over the difficulty.

Other punishable crimes include sp e akin g-w -the-m on th-fu 11, ' failing to use . the Battery butter-knife, drinking tea out of our china saucers, and upsetting the jar of toothpicks.

The question of the distribution of income, less tax, 'less accounts overdue, less damages paid for defamation of character, less salaries to the committee, is to be decided at the next Union quarterly.

HAUL

y: At 2nd N.Z.E.F’. Headquarters there was a German-speaking New Zealander whose job it was to interX rogate German prisoners. He was j working on a new batch one day when an impatient British staff officer - enquired of him “Got anything out of them yet?” X Confidentially : the Kiwi replied 7 “Two watches so far, sir. Do - you want one?”, * -