Women as Friends

Ladies' Mirror, Volume 5, Issue 5, 1 November 1926, Page 78

Women as Friends

Tt is often asserted by persons of . ■*- both sexes that women lack the virtue of real friendship with one another ; that they are incapable of loyal and disinterested companionship. Like all other sweeping statements of its kind, it contains an element of truth as well as of untruth. The former clement is, however, infinitisimal. A “catty” woman is, in some ways, worse than a brutal man, as mental cruelty is worse than physical. Women who are enemies often do a great deal more harm than men would ; as we are told, “The female of the species is more deadly than the male.” But the friendship of men seems to be based more on a sort of blind herd instinct rather than on a reasoned personal liking for a particular being. This is found in his early devotion to such institutions as clubs and societies. Here he meets his own kind in the mass, and displays his bent for social intercourse with his fellowmen, sedulously fostered from early school-days. Hence his alleged superiority in the matter of friendship. Satisfied with their Own Sex Meanwhile, women, with no such advantages (till quite recently), have been held to be deficient in “clannishness.” No doubt they have been from one point of view, but through no fault of their own. Women have, however, always been able to be friends and to show discrimination in their friendships. They have admired and liked one another, and this admiration or liking is based on qualities (real or imaginary) possessed by either or both. It seems that in the rare cases of friendship between women there is a wonderfully deep and constant vein of affection; a personal feeling of liking not seeking its own ends or based on a vague desire for popularity. In a world so full of women and so denuded of “ complementary ” men it is, I think, a very good thing that some women can be perfectly satisfied with their own sex for love and friendship. These women, for whom I venture to speak, beg unbelievers not to impugn the veracity and sincerity of their friendships, even if such a state of affairs seems foreign to them. For it is certainly time that this hoary fallacy received decent burial. i:iiiiniiiiiiinii!iiii!imiNi!!iiiiiiiiniiiiii!iiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiniiiiiniiiiiiiiiiiiimnniiiiiii