She takes me Motoring

Ladies' Mirror, Volume V, Issue 2, 2 August 1926, Page 52

She takes me Motoring

It was with a heavy heart and a dull foreboding of impending disaster that I signed the cheque payable to the Dreadnought School of Motoring,” fees in advance to teach Margery how to drive and tend a motor car.

" Think how useful it will be when I can drive " Margery argued. "At the present time our car stands idle sometimes for weeks together, simply because you are too lazy to go out, but when I can drive, there will be no end to the pleasure and excitement we shall gel out of it." I felt sure there would be plenty of excitement. While the lessons lasted I began to feel that, perhaps, the money had been well spentthey took Margery off my hands for hours together, but when one eventful morning she entered my study and proudly handed to me a printed card, signed and countersigned by two gentlemen I had never heard of before, wherein it was set forth that Margery Plumpton had been granted by the aforementioned " Dreadnought School of Motoring a first-class diploma for driving—repairing and general management of a motor car, all my old misgivings returned ' to me ten-fold. " Now I'm going to take you for a run," Margery announced.

T PLEADED pressure of busi- -*- ncss, but to no avail, in no time Margery had me out of the house and before I fully realised what had happened I found myself seated heside my wife in our little two-seat-er Wolscley. " Now then, where would you like to go to ? " asked Margery. I had a feeling that no matter where we would like to go—we would soon find ourselves at the nearest police station. 1 mentioned a route on which I calculated we were not likely to encounter much traffic, and sitting hack in my seat prepared myself for the worst.

Margery started the engine and we sat for a few minutes with the car throbbing its heart out in the curb —while Tony, the kid who lives next door, stood and gazed at us, his in outh wide open and a large, gaudily painted indiarubber ball in his arms. Tf VERY now and then, Margery - t - v would exhilarate, in the most alarming fashion and I wondered what was going to happen next. " Aren't we going to start ? " I asked at length. " Not until the engine is properly warmed up," Margery explained, " that's where so many people make a mistake," she went on. " You in particularyou start off at once, and never give the poor engine a chance. Now Mr. Jonesat the Dreadnought—told me that the way to start a carShe released the clutch and we hounded forth with a leap—little Tony gave a piercing shriek—dropped his ball and took refuge in the front garden—there was a sound of a loud explosion.

"What's that?" I cried, regaining my seat as best I could. Margery turned and looked over her shoulder—l also turned round and caught a vision of Tony, weeping bitterly over what was left of his highly coloured ball. " Oh, it's nothing," answered Margery, just missing a boy on a trade-cycle and passing a hand barrow on the wrong side of the road. " I've only run over his ball; I can soon buy him another." At the top of our street she changed gear, and when my teeth had regained their composure, we had turned the.corner and were in the main road. " Now there is another thing that you always do, but which is entirely wrong," Margery informed me, " when you turn a corner " " Look out where you're going " I shouted as a large motor van loomed up before us.

A/TARGERY put on both brakes VA at once and I flattened my hat against the windscreen. " I wish you wouldn't worry me," Margery exclaimed, "you make me so self-conscious. I'm driving the caryou are my passenger and you mustn't talk to the man at the wheel." I set my teeth and remained silent and we set off again. " Mr. Jones says," Margery remarked at length, " that it is not one's own driving that one has to fear, but that of other people. He says watch every corner carefully and always lie prepared for the unexpected." At that moment an Irish terrier dashed out in front of Margery put her rudder hard to port and we took a pile of loose stones with a sickening hump. "Now if I hadn't been watching what 1 was doing," she explained, "we might have "

CHE went into top gear with a crash, and much to her surprise. ! hat lever’s loose." she complained, " I hardly touched it and it did that.” We were Hying along now at the speed of a French express— I felt sick and dizzy and closed my eyes, wondering it 1 would ever open them again in this world, " You are not going to sleep " asked Margery at last. 1 told her that I had never felt wider awake and opening my eyes, discovered to my relief that we were in the country. " Now we can let her go." said Margery. I begged her not to. but she had the bit between her teeth. For about two miles the road was straight with a high hedge on either side, hut 1 could see we were approaching a curve—-and something told me that disaster awaited us round the corner. "He careful of that curve!" I warned my wife, "slow down for Heaven’s sake!" She answered me with a peal of laughter.

" You arc a coward! " she exclaimed disdainfully. And then we turned the corner it was there! I had known all along that it was there—although I knew not what form it would take—the thing that we were now charging down was a huge traction engine, drawing three open trucks of broken granite for the roads. TV/TARGERY saw it as soon as 1 - 1 I did. and then she lost her head. " Oh, Tom! " she screamed, " Save me ! " My next recollection is of sitting with .Margery in a particularly thorny hedge and gazing at the wreckage of our car. Margery was crying bitterly; I

did ray best to comfort her. Just then another car approached an drew up beside us. ".Good gracious, Margery!" exclaimed a woman's voice from inside, ''What are you doing here?" Margery lept to her feet. " Agnes! " she cried, rushing to the new arrival, "Heaven must have sent you here. Take me home, darling! Take me home, he has nearly killed me ! " She was pointing to me " I'm afraid I have only room for one," Agnes apologised. "Oh, that will do!" replied Margery joyfully, jumping in beside her friend, "We can send someone to fetch Tom —besides, it was all his fault! He ditched the —let him get out of it himself."'