THE DAILY ROUND.

Waikato Times, Volume 113, Issue 18952, 23 May 1933, Page 4

THE DAILY ROUND.

SHOTS IN PASSING.

(By “Wanderer.”).

CHEESE THAT IS CHEESE

“We regret to say that the cheesf position is still unsatisfactory,” states the annual report of a South Island dairying organisation. With this weighty judgment, of .course, one hastens to agree. The flavour is unsatisfactory, the price is unsatisfactory, and the quality is unsatisfactory. Really it is rather a wrnnder that we bother to make cheese at all. Still, to cease manufacture would put a lot of orate makers out of business. However, to revert to our South Island friends, they have bewailed the retrogression in quality of their local cheese, and said many unkind things about the North Island brew. Which doesn’t improve either their cheese or ours.

The suggestion that' Southland cheese should be separately branded and sold is rather humorous. English people look at the map, where,they see a small blot near Australia, with the words “New Zealand" staggering outwards across the Paciflo Ocean. By the exercise of their powers of imagination they induce in themselves the realisation that this lit.tie blot produces butter—much butter—and also a substance xvhich the inhabitants call cheese. The more imaginative read literature on the subject of the aforesaid blot and learn that big game fishing is available in and around the borders of the blot (aforesaid). But these are not the people who buy cheese. Rather do they order cheese, which, being of the Swiss, Limburger •or Gorgonzola variety, is able to answer the summons of its own free will—and the cheese comes to them.

It is not an easy task, therefore, to persuade the people who are destined to eat New Zealand cheese that the small blot is capable of subdivision into even smaller blots, one of which can produce cheese which is more like cheese than the cheese which is called cheese but is not cheese—oh, cheese it I # * * • MODERN DEFINITIONS. Temerity: The spirit which prompts a man to ask “What exactly is Douglas Credit?" THE VICIOUS CIRCLE.

“A service which comes under the heading or safety and convenience or traffic is the removal or nails, tacks, horseshoes, staples and other metal punctureproducing material from the road surfaces,” remarked Mr A. Tyndall, englneor to the Main Highways Board, in an address In Wellington last week. "During the past 18 months a magnetic truck nas operated over our highways and has picked up an average of about 400 nails, tacks, etc., per mile. I do not suggest further research, as it may lead to a realisation that this service is Just another case of Government Interference with private business.”

We have always wondered how so many nails and tacks found their way on to the main roads. To complete the circle, why not sell the scrap metal to Japan, and the depression will soon be over.

• a • • THE SUFFERING CHINESE,

Unless abnormal conditions develop th» pressure or Argentine wheat on the world markets may be regarded as over for this season, according to the Buenos Aires correspondent or the Canadian Bureau of Statistics. He says China has purchased considerable quantities ot Argentine wheat.—Cable item.

And so China is going to learn to eat bread, and, presumably, like It, Now’s our chance to extoll the virtues of bread and butter AND CHEESE I MORE RESTRICTION? The latest spasm of argument and apprehension anent the quotas and the proposed restriction of dairy, produce exports has barely subsided ere some other form of restriction possible, probable or contemplated, appears to vex us.

This time it concerns the ascent of mountains, or the approach to lakes and so on. It is a point which hardly ever occurs to us in New Zealand, where we instinctively regard all ■scenic'-possessions as public property —that the means of access to them may be through private property. And private property argues an owner, present or absent, who has it within his power to object to the passage of the public over his own land. What I mean to say is—suppose one of these South Island station-holders owned all the foothills round Mount Cook. What could we do about It, if he was a little bit peppery and refused to allow strangers, or tresspassers as he would call them, to pass over his property in their trips of exploration? Absolutely nothing. But what of the owner? Wouldn’t wo brand him as a narrow-minded oia fossil and a perverse hindrance to the march of science, or the quest of health, or the pursuit of pleasure (according to the clothes one was wearing) ? Of course we would. Yet if a geyser broke out in the bottom of my garden, just next to the celery bed, I would unhesitatingly declare my strawberry beds and cabbage patch as'-a public right of way, so that all and sundry might derive pleasure from seeing my geyser. Wouldn’t I? HOW’S THAT? From an informative (contemporary! SPORTSMAN PROSECUTED. PHEASANT ILLEGALLY SHOT. USE OF MOTOR CYCLE.

I always knew a .motor cycle was an Infernal machine, but — », * * *

NOT CRICKET,

A Wanganui Chinese market gardenef has discovered a means or keeping .the white butterfly ofT his cabbage patch. He noticed lhat the butterny did not settle on the lettuce plants, so by way or experiment he boiled a quantity or outsldo leaves or the lettuce and sprayed the water on the cabbages. The result, he states, is highly satisfactory.— (News hern).

What a low-down trick 1 It Is on a par with the prohibitionist who would adulterate the workingman’s beer with toothpaste—all for a good purpose ho would say.