IN THE POLICE COURTS.

Waikato Times, Volume 104, Issue 17465, 27 July 1928, Page 10

IN THE POLICE COURTS.

HUMOROUS INTERLUDES. “I have prospects after to-day," was a debtor's assurance at Whitechapel County Court. Solicitor (to witness in Shoreditch County Court) : "The motor-car went over you?” Witness: "I went under it.” V 0 3 e A debtor was asked at Shoreditch: “Don’t you think it is hard on the plaintiff to ask him to wait three months for his money?” He replied: “if is harder on me to ask me to pay j it.” * * a * I Man at Ilighgatc sued for a debt: “I I can give you my albert in pledge.” I The magistrate: “We arc not pawa- ! brokers.” i * * * ® ■ Woman applicant at Willesdcn: “She ! has not exactly threatened me, but she j fold me what her son would do to me.” ! The mnkistrate: “That is not a threat, i it is either prophecy or information.” ■. V # <? -f ! When Harry Brown, a defendant, ! failed to appear at Tower Bridge the | following telegram was handed Mr ! Fry, the magistrate: “Epsom, Wcdnes- { day.—Absent. Business. Guilty. ! Wire line to H. Brown, Epsom Post Cilice.” * * * * “She is a good girl, but her one fault is her hands,” said the father of a girt aged 15, charged at Kingston-on-Thames with stealing. tfc Ip # “I don’t know anything about it. I am sorry I am not guilty though,” said a man charged with theft at North London. * * * * “We had a dispute in a public-house as-to who should pay for the drinks,” said a man at How, E., County Court. The Registrar: “Who did pay?” The Man: “1 paid for myself.” A woman found drunk on the police station steps was only lined 3s, as the Clorkenwcll magistrate said she had saved a lot of Double. * * V 5 When Rev. T. Strong, rector of Sandy, Bedfordshire, was asked at a Westminster inquest if lie had not said previously that a man intended to throw himself under an omnibus, he replied: “Yes, but that was not on oath.” * * * * Mr Pope, the Clerkenwcll magistrate, referring to a badly worded sentence in an Act, said a committee of magistrates should be appointed to draw up the Statutes. Mr Biekelts, solicitor: “That would not be any good if the House of Commons had to deal with them.” * i "When a separation case, Marriage v. Marriage, was called at North London, it was announced that the husband and wife had ooine lo an agreement, j

“He picked up the lawn mower and hung it round my neck.” A woman charging a Belgian with assault at North London. * •-» =? “I thought they were marking lime to let me pass,” pleaded a motorist at Chester when fined for driving through a company of soldiers. * sj» £ * Victoria Street is about the worst road in London for skidding.—Mr Oddie, the Westminster coroner.