MISCELLANEOUS.

Wellington Independent, Volume XV, Issue 1341, 24 June 1859, Page 5

MISCELLANEOUS.

The Retort U.xounTEous.— "The discor dant spirit which recently prevailed in your party," said one politician to anutlior, " seems to be passing into ours." "Oh, yes, when the devils were cast out of the inau they went into the herd of swine."

" What can I give you for a keepsake, my dearest John, sobbed out a sentimental girl to hei lover about to join his ship. "Give, my dearest angel," cried Jnclc in great confusion, '■ hem ; why you haven't such a thing as a live pound note on you, I suppose." A young.fop, who had just begun to shave for a beard, stopped into a. barber's shop, aud after a grand swagger desired to be shaved. The barber went through theusnal movement. The young sprigjumped up with a flourish, exclaiming, "Maw foine fellow, what's your charge?" " Oh ! no charge," was the reply."'" No charge j how's that?" -'Why, we are always thankful when we can get soft e.ilf-skin to whet our razors on."

A new settler, somewhere in Missouri, gives the following graphic description of the people and the country iv the section of Uncle Sams dominions:—" As for the country, the land is as cheap as dirt, and goud enough; but the climate is rainy, bluwy, and sultry. The people die so fast here, that every man has his third wife, and eveiy woman is a widow,"

An Irishman, lately risiting the Zoological Gardens was close.ly examining-a small ■animal called an horuiijfuero, or an ant-eater, that had become quite domesticated. "What do you call it?"—"lt is an nut-eater," replied the young mau >bom lie addressed.''" O.i, wirru sthru? that small thing eat ants ! By thundei, I wish I hart it iv Ireland, if it would eat ants then—for I have an old aunt there myself, who has kept me out of property these last lifteen years."

Declaration of Indepe.ndescb. A gentlemau who has just returned from Arkansas heard ihe following conversation at a tiTern:—" Halloa, boy !"—Holloa yourself!"— Can 1 get breakfast here ?"—" I don't reckon you can-"—" Why not?—" Afassa's away,'mistress's druuk, the baby's got the colic, and I don't cere a darn for nobody" Wisdom is not likely to die with all Scotchmen, " canny" as they are admitted to be in general, if wo arc to believe a story in an English journal to this effect:—" A lifeshire man brings his child to the minister to be baptized, who asks him 'Are you prepared for so important, so solemn an occasion ?' ' Prepared ?' he echoe3, with some indignatioii. ' I ha'e a lirlot o' bannocks bakin', U'a bacon bams, a glide fat kebbeck, au' a gallon o , the best Hielan whisky; an' I wad just like to ken what better preparation ye could exp'ek fra a man in my condition p' life !' Heiineant the 'christening' at home." A kindred mistake is made by auotber peasant, who hearing Prince. Albert prayed for iv the service, fancies a'small steamboat of that name

U object intended ; and, on coming out of the church is greatly incensed that the matter should ' make sio a sang aboiit a bit cockle shell o' a thing they ca' Prince Albert, a craft nde rauckle bigger than a Common wherry that Carries a wheen coals, and a sma' steam kettle id its belly!"— Knickefboiher. '

MinA.cur.ons Esoai'r.—The Steiglittf correspondent of the Geelong Advertiser says s—This morning (Monday) one of the miners belonging to the claim known as Fly wheei claim, on Boxing Reef, had occasion to go down the reef (at present abandoned) to obtain a bucket left in the old workings j when near the bottom of the perpendicular shaft he imagined that he heard a noise calling to him to lower the bucket, and on doing so found a miner of the name of Thomas Obey lying at the bottom Who informed him that he had fallen down the Shaft the previous evening, end had been thdre ever since—the shaft being 100 feet perpendicular and 60 on the slant, in all 160 feet. On being raised to the surface, and conveyed to his tent, medical advice was prooured, but Dr. Geoghegan repoits that no bones have been broken, ot other external wounds inflicted, and that if any injury has been sustained it is internal and hidden, and apparently not of a dangerous nature. Foui goats have also been discovered at the bottom of the same shaft, all of them dead. Probably their bodies, in some measure broke the fall of the miner.

WoxDEBs of the Micaoscopß.—The fate* resting manner in which science is now made familiar to the minds of the young, may dispel the wonder with which the more aged sometimes speak; of the " propriety" of children of the present time. The combined uses of the photographic art and the mioroscope have been called into reqaisition for the purposes of instruction, and the following brief outline of a powerful microscope now on sale at Messrs. Brush and MacDonnell's, and of the objects brought under it, may be interesting. The objects are representations of celebrated pictures, ice, and may be described as of the size of a large pin's head. They are fastened on a small piece of glass about two inches long and three-fourths of an inch wide, and are protected by having fastened over them another small circular piece of glass. One of the photographs is a copy of Sturgeon's tablet in Kirkly Lonsdale Church. The original is of four feet size; the collodiotype is the siZu of a pin's head j and yet when placed under the microscope the whole 755 letters of which the epitaph is composed can be clearly read. Another photograph is that of a £20 Bank of England note, visible to the naked eye only as a speck upon the glass, but, when viewed through the microscope, apparently of full size, with signature and even water murks, most distinct. These objects are well worthy of a visit.

Fabmer's Pbofits,—lt would pay a farmer well to sell his beans to his sheep at 40s. per quarter, because that price is about Id. per pound, and, mutton at Id. per pound, would pay for the seven pound of beans required to make it. The beans thus remain on the farm. But, even supposing that you gave to yonr sheep four quarters of beans per acre, and thai you lose ten per cent, by them, or 16s. per acre, I am prepared to prove that, in the corn crop that follows the increase will be at least£3 per acre beyond the sum that would otherwise be realised. I know a farmer witLin a few miles of me who always allows his 1,500 fattening sheep one pound of beans per diem when feeding in the field ; the consequence is a general and progressive enrichment of the soil, which almost coir pels him to take an extra crop to tame the land.— Sayinge and doings of Mr. Alderman Mechi. .

Extraoudinaet Case of Kidn'appixg: Oα Fridayafteruoon,about4o'clock,Mrs. Cook, thq wife of a respectable tradesman residing at North Melbourne, accompanied by her daughter a little child 3 years of age, haviug occasion to cross Swanstonrstreet, in the direction of Gteat Bourke srteet, allowed a stranger, a respectable looking man, to hand the child across the street, which was very dirty, whilst she waited a few seconds ou theiron bridge to allow a car to pass by. On crossing heiself, immediately after the car had passed, to her surprise and alarm no traces of the mun or the child cotild be discovered. Mrs. Cook at first imagined that he had taken the child into some sh')p near at hand, but on making inquiry in the neighbourhood, not the slightest information cuuld be procured to guide her in her search after the child. As a. last resource, and after every other means of discovery had been tried in vain, information was given at the police station, but up to a late hour last night, no discovery bad been made by the police with refereuce to this very singular case. The child was dressed in a brown frock, black hat, trimmed with scarlet and black ribbon, and feather. She also had on a mohair jacket, white stockings, and black cloth boots. The mother is, unfortunately, unable to describe the man who took the child out of her arms.—Argus of Monday. i Statistics op Population ajjo Beligion. —The directors of the statistical bureau of Berlin furnishes the following curious statement: — "The population of the whole earth is estimated to be 1,288,000,000, viz.: Europe, 272,000,000; Asia, 755,000,000 ; Africa, 200.000,000;; America, 59,000,000,; and Australia, 2,000,000 The population of Europe is thus subdivided: Russia co.itains 62,000,000; the Austrian States 36,395,620; France, 36,039,364 j Great Britain and Ireland, 27,488,853 ; Prussia, 17,089,407; Turkey, 18,740,000 ; Spain, 151,518,00(1 ; the Two Sicilies, 8,616,922; Sweeden and Norway, 5,072,820; Sardinia, 4,976,034 ; Belgium, 4,607,066; Bavaria, 4,547,239 ; the Netherlands, 3,487,617; Portugal, 3,471,109; the Papal Slates,3,loo,ooo; Switzerland, 2,494,500, Denmark, 2,468,643. In Asia,' the Chinese' Etnpiie contains 400,000,000; the East Indies, 171,000,000 jthelndiau Archipelago, 80,000,000 Japan, 35,000,000; Hindostan, Turkey, each 15,000,000. In America the United States are computed to con tain 23,191,876 Brazil, 7,677,800 ; Mexico, 7,661,520. 'In the several nations of the earth there are 335,000,000 of Christians (of whom 170,O0';,0OO are Papist* 89,000,000 Protestants/and 76,000,000 followere of the Greek Church.) The number of. Jews aranunts to 5,000,000 ;of these 2,890,750 are iv Europe, .viz.: 1,250,000 in European Russia, 833,304 in Austria, 234,248 in Priusia ; 192,170 in other parts of Germany, 62,470 in the Netherlands, 33,953 in Italy, 73,995 in France, 86,000 in Great Britain, and 70,000 in Turkey. The followers of various Asiatic religious are estimated at '600,000,000, Mahomedanj at 160,000,000, and '-heathens" (the Gentiles proper), at 20,000,000,— Bulletin.

The Utah Expedition.—The Philadelphia Presse, publishes a letter from Leauenworth, giving the leading items of the cost of transportation of supplies for the Utah army;' One hundred and forty-six trains of waggons were sent out—total number of waggons,: 4790. Each train bad 320 yoke ot oxen—total oxen, 46,720. Thirty, men were apportioned to a train—total, 4389. The number of pounds of freight conveyed across the Plains was 24,000,000 These are the principal items only,. The aggregate cost of the expedition may be inferred. ■ ■■.■;■■