OVER THE TEACUPS.

Wanganui Herald, Volume LIII, Issue 16044, 7 February 1920, Page 8

OVER THE TEACUPS.

JURY OF MATRONS. After Mary Grime, 27, a single woman, had been sentenced to death at Manchester for the murder of her child, aged 2, a jury of matrons was empannelled. Medical evidence having been given that the woman was about to become a mother, Mr Justice McCardie postponed the execution of the sentence until after the birth of the child. TOWN FOR SALE. Lord Wilton is selling his Weymouth estate in the spring. He is Weymouth’s ground landlord, and the greater part of the town will come under the hammer, including the premises of principal business establishment and most of the fine terraces on the seafront. Lord Wilton succeeded to the property of the late Sir Frederick Johnstone, who formerly represented Weymouth in Parliament. KITTEN SUFFOCATES < BABY. A verdict of accidental suffocation by a cat was returned at an inquest at Hinckley on John Sharpe, a six-weeks-old child. The mother stated that when she awoke at 6 a.m., the cat, which was only half-grown, was lying on the child’s mouth. She flung the animal off, but the child was dead. The kitten came into their house some time ago, and being black, her father said he would not turn it out. NOT ADVANCED ENOUGH. Mrs Profiteer: I want a piece of music for my little girl, who is learning to play the piano. Shopkeeper: Yes, madam, here is “Twilight” for Is fid; how would that suit? Mrs Profiteer: Oh, she is further advanced than that; why last week she played a piece that cost half-a-crown; haven’t you got something about 43 fid? WOMEN IN PYJAMAS. The Red Cross has distributed 41X1,000 suits of pyjamas in the Balkans. These garments, it is said, was originally intended for use' in hospitals, but ■so great has the lack of clothing become in the East that women and children are gladly making use of them for ordinary garments. BIGGEST MAN ON EARTH. Compared with Patrick O’Connor, Albert Brough, who died a short time ago, and who, owing to his 7ft 7in., was reported to be the tallest man in the world was a midget. O’Connor, who i 3 at present in South Africa, is stated to be the biggest man on earth. Certainly he is the tallest British subject. A veritable modern Hercules, O’Connor is almost Bft high, and a person 6ft fiin high can walk beneath his arms when outstretched horizontally. He has a chest measurement of 55in, and weighs 3571b., while the ring which adorns the index finger of the giant’s right hand is so large that a florin can pass easily through it.

SARCASTIC JOHN. Sirs Jones rushed into her husband’s office, wild with excitement. “Oh, John,” she cried, “Norah made a mistake and tried to start the fire with gasoline!” “Gasoline, eh?” said John, calmly. “Did she get it started?” “Get it started!” cried Mrs Jones. “Why it mew her out of the window!” “Oh, well,” remarked the philosophic John, “it was her afternoon out, anyhow.” ORDERED HIS OWN FUNERAL. Field Marshal Sir Evelyn Wood, V.C., was laid at rest at Aldershot. Ten days before liis death, while lying ill in bed, lie personally wrote to the undertakers at Aldershot, who conducted his wife’s funeral in 1891, giving minute instructions regarding his own interment in a grave to be dug adjoining that holding the remains of Lady YVood. He also went over with the chaplain the details of the service, selecting the hymns to be sung, which were favourites of Lady Wood, the same as rendered at her funeral; Seven full generals and one admiral were pall-bearers at the field-mar-shal’s funeral. THE DENTIST’S DOMAIN. fc They passed a magnificent mansion. That’s a fine house,” said Brown, and yet I can’t bear to look at it.” “Why not?” asked Jenks. “Because it is built out of the blood, the aches, the groans of human beings* out of the grief of children, and the wails of women.” Why, is the owner a money-lender?” “No,” he’s a dentist.” THE PRINCE’S DOUBLE. There is a young officer in the British Ai my belonging to the regiment of which the Prince of Wales is the domminating figure who is the absolute double of the heir to the throne. So remarkable is the likeness that advantage has been taken of it to the extent that he has been deputised for the I nnco when the latter has been ill reviewing troops, and attending tions, and nobody has been a'ny the wiser. J In London this young officer has most

embarrasing time. H© is saluted by generals and officers much senior to himself, being obviously mistaken for the King’s son. The young officer is known to many friends as “Harry,” and he belongs to one of the best British families. GOT HIS ANSWER. At a political meeting held in a large provincial town some months ago, a crowded audience had assembled to support a local candidate for parliamentary honours. During the speech of the candidate, an interruption took place in the form of a man who put his head in at the door, and shouted in a stentorian voice: “Can anyone here sell me sixpennyworth .of. sense?” The speaker halted, evidently quite dumbfounded, hut the chairman of the meeting immediately silenced the intruder by retorting: “Yes, but you have nothing to put it in.” MYSTERY NECKLACE. WITHDRAWN AT ,£67,000. There was a hush, followed by a much good-humoured banter, when the auctioneer at Messrs Johnson, Dymond, and Son’s crowded saleroom in London announced that he was about to put up a magnificent pearl necklace of imperial and historic interest. The mystery rope of pearls, reputed to be worth £300,000, is said to be the property of the descendants of the Czarina Nathalie, mother of Peter the Great, and the announcement drew a large number of fashionably dressed women. The auctioneer suggested a start at £150,000, but the first price mentioned was £50,000, and by bids of £IOOO tbe price was slowly raised to £67,000, when the necklace was withdrawn. A magnificent blue and white dropshaped diamond of about 32 carats was sold for £7300. AFRICANS NEVER SNEEZE. It is a strange fact that Africans never sneeze; neither do their descendants- if they are pure-blooded, although domiciled in other parts of the world. MEDICAL WOMEN IN CHINA. In the whole of China it may be estimated that there are approximately 170 women doctors of recognised standing, states Stri Dharma, the official or-, gan of the Women’s Indian Association. LOTH TO PART. Talking of shoes, Charlie Chaplin entertains quit© a sentimental affection for his “’mud scows,” the familiar largesized pedal extremities one always associates with the famous comedian. Although constant wear has left them in a state of extreme patchiness, Charlie is loth to part with them. IT WASN’T FINISHED. A very old man was accosted in the village street by a stranger, who said: “Excuse me, but you must be a great age?” “Yes,” responded the old gentleman. “I be getting on for ninety-five.” “And have you lived here all your life?” asked the stranger. ,‘No c not yet,” was the. reply.

ANOTHER KINSHIP TANGLE. “Here’s a real tangle,” says a Chicago paper. Mrs Lilian Wearer -was married to Fred Weaver, her mother’s second husband’s brother, and became the stepmother of her mother’s two rieoes by marriage and her stepfather’s sister-in-law. Mrs Weaver asked for an annulment on the grounds that she was under age at the time of her marriage. Now what is the relation between Lillian and her mother’s two nieces? Or her stepfather? None at all. Figure it out for yourself. PURELY ACCIDENTAL. H’isband (furiously): Here's my best meerschaum pipe broken ! How in the name of sense did it happen? Wife: I don’t know, except that when I got up this morning I found your meerschaum pipe on the front door mat and your shoes on the parlour mantelpiece. Husband (mildly); Oh, well, accidents will happen. TRIPS TO THE PLANETS. Trips to the planets are a possibility, Professor George d© Bothezat, Russian aeronautical engineer, told the Western Society of Engineers at Chicago recently. “Among aviation possibilities,” he said, “is the invention of a machine propelled by a jet, which would take no count of space. “I already have in mind such a plane,” ho continued. “An ordinary motor flown by a propeller would be used until the air becomes too rarified; then the motor would be shut off and the plane flown by a series of gas explosions that would drive it on through space. The jet propulsion is not yet perfected, but it’s coming soon,” DOGGED BY NUMBER 13. Superstitious readers, says London Answers, will bo interested in the following extraordinary story, of which the hero is F. G. Cordwell, the wellknown Elect Street newspaperman. Mr Cordwell has been literally dogged by the number 13. It was on the 13th of the month that he attested, went to France, went into action, got his first leave, and returned to take up his commission. It was in the 13th tent, in 13 lines, 13th camp, that he had his first lodgment in France. The tent contained 13 men. He had 13 days in the hospital. He was given No. 13 pills. And, returning to civil work on January 13, he found that his old room had been renumbered 113. Now count up the above coincidences. You will find 13 of them. LONGEVITY HAS DRAWBACKS. Extreme longevity, such a>s Dr. Voronoff promises us with the aid of monkeys’ “innards,” has its drawbacks,says the Manchester Guardian. In. 1888 Janos Meryessi, who was 84 years of age, jumped off the suspension bridge at Buda Pest into the Danube. He was rescued., and explained that he wished

to end Ms life, as lie was becoming too decrepit to support his father and mother. This extraordinary statement . proved to be true, Meryessi’s parents being aged 116 and 110 respectively. A public subscription was organised to set them all three above want. FILMING THE SOUTH POLE. An interesting film we are shortly to see is that which has been brought back by Sir Ernest ShackJeton on his last voyage in the Antarctic. The progress of the ship Endurance, which I hear cost ,£20,000 to build, • as she comes forward into the ice-bound regions, shows some wonderful photography. I hear that in one part of the film the photographer stood on the ice as the ship came towards him, and was knocked over as the ice broke with the ship’s weight—the result being that the ship looks as if she is coming out of the picture on to the audience. Sir Ernest Shacklcton says that these films were carried about on the ice for nearly a year before they were brougnt to a place of safety. They show many incidents of the life on an Antarctic expedition, with delightful studies of dogs and penguins. During the Christmas holidays, Sir Ernest- will lecture with tho films in London.

UNKNOWN ON THE FARM. Farmer (to one of his labourers, recently demobilised): “Well, Pat, which do you prefer, being a farmer or a soldier?” Pat: “In one way, sir, I’d rather be a soldier.” Farmer: “And how’s that?” Pat: “Well, you see, you’d be a long time workin’ for a farmer before fie’d tell you to stand at ease’.”