OVER THE TEACUPS.

Wanganui Herald, Volume LIII, Issue 16038, 31 January 1920, Page 10

OVER THE TEACUPS.

A FAMILY OP 21. A youth of 17 who pleaded guilty at Westminster Police Court to a charge of theft was stated to he one of a family of 21 children. He himself was married and the father of twins. KINEMA IN CHURCH. The Rev. G. B. Code, the newlyappointed vicar of St. Bartholomew’s Church, Birmingham, is to instal a kineroa. One film of a religious tone will be shown each Sunday in addition to the regular services. The screen will be suspended in front of the altar, and the operating box will be in the west gallery. At Swansea fie Archbishop of York said people were weary of mere exhortations to be good. If the clergy were to do their duty they must provide continuous teaching to illumine a great deal of the vague and fleeting religious thoughts of the times. THE PART GREATER THAN THE WHOLU Little Johnnie had an apple, which he was beginning to munch during the lunch-hour. Another small boy sitting near him eyed him in envy. In fact, he stared so hard that Johnnie felt awkward. At last he could stand it no longer. Handing over the rosy apple, he said; “Have a bite?” Eagerly the other youngster took the apple and bit. When Johnnie got bis apple back again, he looked at it in wonder. Then ho turned to the other boy, now busily munching, and cried: “Here! Give me that bite, and you can have the apple !” QUEST FOR A WIFE. Sir Nevil Macready, England’s Chief Commissioner of Police, received recently a request which is novel even for Scotland Yard. A young man in the United States wants a wife, and writes to know “if you can help me in finding a nice young woman in the twenties, as I would like to correspond with her.” He adds that he does not “bank on” American girls and is coming to England for a holiday. He is of a “nice quiet disposition,” and encloses his photograph. Sir Nevil, however, politely declined to act as a. matrimonial agent. SWEEPS SUNDAY TROUSERS. There were amusing passages between a judge and a chimney-sweep at Manchester County Court. The sweep claimed £2 10s from the owner of an Irish terrier which he alleged had bitten him twice and made two small holes in the trousers of his £6 6s suit. Ten shillings had been paid into Court. The chimney-sweep produced the trousers and the judge inspected the holes. Judge Mellir: Have you a wife?— The sweep; Yes, sir. They could be easily mended?—lt is my best suit; I only wear it on Sundays. I could not wear mended trousers on Sundays. I am a judge, but I wear mended trousers —Maybe, but not on Sundays. Judgment was given for the sweep for 20s, including the 10s. paid into Court.

“IDLE RICH” CLAUSE IN A WILL.

In leaving most of his property for public uses, Mr Nicholas Emmanuel Youvalis, of Willesden Lane, N.W., a sponge merchant, whose estate has been valued for English probate at ,£79,500, stated in his will: “My relatives are to make no complaint because I do not leave them anything, as my principle is that those people who leave money to their relatives insult them by looking upon them as incapable people, and turning them into idlers.” He made provision for his wife and mother, left bequests to employees, and the residue to the Greek Orthodox community in Kalymnos, an island in the Levant, for schools and hospitals. TRIAL BY ORDEAL. The student had to face the. ordeal of an examination in astronomy. On emerging from the torture chamber one of his companions asked him how he got on. “First rate,” he said. “They only asked me two questions, and I, answered them both promptly and correctly.” “What were the questions?” “The first was: “What is a parallax?” and I told them I didn’t know. And the second was: “Can you calculate an eclipse?” to which I said ‘No.’ I’d like to see anybody answer two questions more correctly than that!”

MAGIC WATER CHAIN. Great interest was taken at Norwich Pat Cattle Show in an ingenious French idea for lifting water from wells without a bucket. Messrs Boulton and Paul have acquired the rights of this invention, which consists of an endless chain covered with a spiral of wire suspended in the well, and weighted with a heavy free pulley to keep it taut. All one has to do to get water is to turn a hanble, which sets the chain revolving over a deeply grooved pulley at the top. The water is entrapped in the interstices of the spiral by capillary attraction, and thus is lifted from the well until, as the chain passes over the grooved pulley at the top, it rt thrown off by centrifugal force. A LAND GIRL’S ROMANCE. “Peggy” Fisher, the land girl who won the Distinguished Service Bar for saving a male fellow-farm worker from being gored by an infuriated bull, was married on Saturday at Plefcehing, Sussex, to the man whose life she saved, Arthur Marshall, a demobilised soldier. The wedding was a great event in the district, the bride arriving at the church in a waggon drawn by six horses, their tails plaited with ribbons,, and the waggon decorated with white truelover’s knots. A smock-frooked driver and outriders completed the picture. NURSE CAVELL’S CELL. The Brussels Court of Justice decided to convert the cells of the St. Giells Prison, occupied by Miss Cavell and Mile. Petit, both of whom were shot by the Germans, into a museum. The clothes, books and a few other possessions of these two brave women have been collected and taken there. Tablets draped in flags commemorating their heroic deaths have been placed on the doors of both cells, while inside the cells axe portraits of the two heroines wreathed in flowers. DEAR AT THREEPENCE. The following episode occurred at a Will-known seaside resort the other day ;, “My boy, you have saved my life,” a young swell exclaimed, as he tried to wring water out of his clothes. “Let me reward you.” He thrust his hand into his pocket and brought out a threepenny piece. “There, my boy, take that, but do not spend it foolishly. “No, sir, I can’t take it,” the boy replied, as he pushed the generous hand aside. “I didn’t earn it.” “Why, you saved my life, boy!” “Yes, t know, but it ain't worth threepence.” THE GULP STREAM BOILING. Sailors who have returned from the Gulf of Mexico to England in November reported that the Gulf Stream was almost at the boiling point, and that existence on deck was almost unbearable while ships were passing through it, states the Daily Express. Water dipped from the stream was almost ’warm enough to poach an egg, they asserted. The temperature 100 miles out to sea was 100 degrees above zero. The stream was also said to be ten miles nearer the coast than in July, all of which was believed to be the cause of the hot weather then prevailing along the Atlantic coast.

THE MILK QUESTION AGAIN. The lady of the house gazed into the depths of 'the milk jug and then turned an aii°ry glance upon the milkman, _ “Do” you call this stuff milk?” sue inquired scornfully. “Of course I do,” was the reply. “What would you call it?” “Well, I don’t want to make any insinuations,” she sniffed, “but it looks to me as if a good share of this fin'd came from a pump instead of a «ov. The milkman gazed at her sadly. “My dear madam,” he said impressively. “I assure you on my word of honour that not one drop of it came from a pump.” Brtfc as lie closed tlie srate beninu ium. he murmured to himself: , “If she had said ‘tap’ she’d ha been nearer the mark!”

“THE BIG FOUR.” A scathing epigram on the Council of Four that drew up the Peace Treaty with Germany is being quoted in Pans. Some people attribute it to Marshal Foch. It runs; “One of them knew nothing another thought he knew everything; the third only believed the little he did know; and the fourth may have known, something, but he was silent. It is left to one’s own judgment to distribute these verdicts between Mr Lloyd George. President Wilson, M. Clemenceau, and Signor Orlando.