A WITTY DIVINES STORIES.

Wairarapa Daily Times, Volume LVIII, Issue 8941, 16 December 1907, Page 6

A WITTY DIVINES STORIES.

Some excellent aud amusing stories are told by Dr W. W. Tulloch iv "Serruous and Stray Papers," by "A.X.X.8.," a volume to which Dr Tulloch contributes a biograhpical sketch of the witty divine. A youthful preacher was walking home from church with a venerable elder. The former, iv au evil moment, said: "Tnat was a flue text I had to-day. " Whereupon the elder, with much impressiveuess, replied, "Oh, yes, there was nacthiug tiie matter with the text." Old Dr Muir, "kirking" the Glasgow Town Council, prayed. "Lord have mercy upou tho magistrates of Glasgow such as they are. Make them wiser and better." Aud wheu the town clerk called to say that the magistrates were much aggrieved at beiug prayed for in such a fashion, the answer was instant:—"Dr Muir's compliments to the Lord Provost, and he is very sorry to find that his prayer has not beeu auswered. "

Loug ago, to use the Lord's Prayer condemned a young minister. It was "not sound." It was "a form." In that lamentable day a youth w T ent to preach for fine old Dr Gilchrist on the Oanongate, iv Edinburgh. "We always say the Lord's Prayer here," said the venerable father iv the vestry. The poor youth looked uuhappy. Much evil might come upou him for so doing. And, with a discomfited countenance, he said, "Must I give the Lord's Prayer?" "Not at all," said old Gilchrist, "uot at all, if you cau give us auythiug better." A good mau, the head of a Roman Catholic College, was walking home in the failing light when he beheld iv the middle of tiie road a dark object iv the suow. Drawiug near, he found a little cobbler from the neighbouring hamlet lying rmoonsciously drunk. The Jesuit could uot leave him to perish. So with difficulty he raised him from the ground, aud with great trouble he managed to steer the helpless fellow-mortal to his home, half a mile off. Though nucouscioiis at starting, he had partly regaiued his senses wheu he reached his owu door, and he uttered some words of thanks. The good-natured priest said: "Maybe you wad not be so ceevil if ye keuued who I am." But the answer was ready. Not without dignity, the halfarticulate cobbler replied: "Ou, ay, I ken ye fine. Ye're a Oawth'lic priest. But I'm a man aboon a' prejudice!"