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Wairarapa Daily Times, Volume 2, Issue 284, 8 October 1879, Page 3

Ask a wiso man to write poetry and ho can manage to make a fool of himself at short notice, if vorsesare out of his linn. A dignified Detroit Judge, to oblige a little recently wrote in .111 album, " My pen is poor, my ink is pale, my heart it trembles liko a little dog's tail." After an enthusiastic lover spends two hours hard labor, writing a letter to his girl, and then mars its beauty by spilling a drop of ink on It, he first swears in a very scientific manner for a few momonts, j and then draws a circle round the blot, and tells her it is a kiss, Bonnets are not worn in heathen lands, hence churches are not popular there, It requires a new spring bonnet to develop the latent Christianity of a woman. The proprietor of a building site in Wisconsin advertises his land for sale in this wiso: The town of Poggis and surrounding country is the most beautiful nature ever made, The scenery is celestial ; also, two waggons and a yoke of steers. Twenty-five years ago a Missouri boy left his home and started out to become the President of the United States. He got as far as Cincinnati. The boy is now a man, and is one of the best shoemakers in the Ohio State Prison. This is the way they do their advertising in San Francisco. " man to take his hat off in court," said a judge the other morning to an officer. The offender who turned out to be a lady wearing a fashionable sailor hat, indignantly exclaimed, "I am 110 man, sir!" " Then," said his honor, "I am no judge of anything but good wine, and the best is Heidsieck's champagne, which I always get from F. and V. J. Cassin. at 523, : Front-street.