Signed the Pledge.

Tuapeka Times, Volume XXIII, Issue 1672, 8 March 1890, Page 6 (Supplement)

Signed the Pledge.

But When They Asked for Whisky There Was Trouble.

"It was a atrange scene," said the M^jor, " and I will not soon forget il. Here I wa- 5 , out on the plains, the centre of an adminug group of Indians, standing on a stump, dealing the drink habit some of my most terrible blows. I told them that whisky wss the curse of the white man,' and gave some notable instances that I need not now repeat, I said that the curse of our civilisation was whisky ! whisky ! whisky I and these benighted children of the forest drew closer about me and listened with rapt attention. In my closing remarks I said : " 'Now, my dusky friends, will you forego whisky? Will you put the accursed firewater behind you ? Will you cast rum to the dogs, and be better, truer men and women ?' '• I indicated that I awaited their reply and | was gratified to receive an affirmative grunt j all around the circle. I got out my pledge- | book and went around for them to sign. | None could write, of course, but all were glad to affix their marks, and tho work went on with perfect enthusiasm. After I had | their signatures I thought it wall to again | ascend the stump and offer them a few worda ;of congratulation. I bad not proceeded very far when a large-sizsd warrior interrupted me with the remark : " 'Ugh 1 heap talk ! where's the whisky ?' " I paused a moment, thinking I had not understood him, and he repeated the observation. " 'Whisky, my friend?' I replied in muoh surprise, ' I have no whisky.' " The silence whioh followed was broken by half a dozen braves and a £quaw or two repeating the same ridiculous observation: •• 'Ugh 1 white man talklmuch 1 Where's the whißky ?' " I saw it all," SBid the Major. " These poor children had taken me for an Indian agent or something, who had come to sell them a new kind of whisky. Their interest in my remarks about firewater, their eagerness to sign my paper— it was all oloar now. It was still more clear when a dozen stalwart bucks danced out in front of me, brandished their hatchets, and began to clamor for the whisky. lam not wholly lacking in discretion, if I have flss, and my course was clear. "'" ' Oh, yes, my friends, the whisky,' I began. ' I was just ooming to that. I have j down here at St. Louis a train load of the finest whisky that ever oame to gladden the life of a noble red man. I control seventy or eighty distilleries near Omaha, and by tomorrow will have pipe-line connections with them, and will then be able to pump whisky out here till life will be a dream of riotous \ pleasure. All I will have to do will be to tarn^ a stop-cook, and lo I rum will flow to you in a living and everlasting stream.'

"And, telling them I would take a run down to Sfc.jLcmis and get the thing started, I reached the place where my horse was tied and was soon leaving the scene of my triumph behind me."