CAREER OF MARRIAGE.

Star (Christchurch), Volume LXVI, Issue 20441, 20 October 1934, Page 26 (Supplement)

CAREER OF MARRIAGE.

A Full-time Job, Declares One Woman. MIDDLE CLASS PROTEST* (By KATHLEEN KEXXEDT.} «nce again the subject of the rights, of married women has raised its hoary: head. In your issue of the 13th inst. appeared an article headed “Business Women,” treating of woman and her ! place in the community, with many aj sly dig at the “mother in the home.** But what is woman’s right place in the community if it is not that for which she is most fitted 2 Of what use is her! “social and political enfranchisement”; if she is to neglect her special task to usurp man's kingdom ? In the present! period, when it is so difficult for a man to get one job, why snould a woman, claim that she has a right to take twoti

The writer of the article asserts that it is only the case of the middle-class or professional woman which comes under discussion, while the child of the : “society woman” and of the “working mother” alike have “never stirred the hearts nor perturbed the minds of the self-appointed guardians of the home and family life.” So far as this dictum is true, the reason is that it is chiefly the middle-class which protests. The “working mother” has neither the time nor the inclination to rush into print, while the “society woman” cares little for the opinion of those outside her owq circle. The middle-class woman finds i herself in a new position, feels proud ofl it, and becomes articulate. The case or the married woman teacher came under consideration, because she was asked to resign, if her husband was in a position to keep her, in order to make room fori the large number of unmarried unera-i ployed teachers, both male and female,] and she naturally dragged her sisteraj from other professions into the limelight! with her.

It is, however, incorrect to state that the society mother’s position is not considered. Some years ago I attended a drawing room meeting, where this very subject was under discussion, and where all those present were society women. They considered the subject in all ita aspects very seriously, and one and all declared that, whilst they engaged the services of a highly qualified woman to act as nurse, they still found it necessary to supervise themselves the training—and more especially the moral ’training—of their children. Use of" Creches. As for the “working mother,” her case has occupied the minds of welfare workers for many years. In England children used to be admitted to the, council schools at the age of three, and there were private places where those too young to attend school were looked after. Now there are public creches where children under school age are tended and fed for a few pence a week while mother is at work. Incidentally the use of the term “creche” proves that in France the people were not indifferent to this problem.

Does not the very fact that it is necessary to engage a substitute prove that motherhood is a whole-time job? The mother —whether society, middleclass, or working—must engage another to perform the duties she is unable or unwilling to perform herself, and yet the writer of the article seems to infer that motherhood is only a part-time occupation which may be carried out in a woman’s 6pare time! Just let us take a glance at the ordinary middleclass mother’s day. She must get up early and prepare, or at least supervise, the family breakfast, and prepare thej Hunches of the children of school age. Her morning is fully occupied with! household duties for, even if she lucky enough to have a good maid, there is still need for her to supervise and to give some amount of assistance. After: lunch she may rest, but she must read, to keep herself abreast of current events! and opinions if she wishes to keep upj with her family and to keep her mind! alert. Then she has soeial duties to : perform, visits to pay and receive, and the evening meal to prepare. The children come home from school, the husband from business, and dinner is served. After dinner her real social life begins, and she must be ready to entertain her own friends and those of, her family; while there may in addition] be homework to supervise, although as a rule father is presumed to be of more help in lessons. This glance does not include the mending, sewing, nor the million little odd jobs that crop up during the day, while if there are babies to see to in addition, there does not seem to be much time for extraneous work such as teaching other folk’s children or minding other people’s business in any way. Even with all the modern labour-saving devices, if a woman is to keep abreast of modern; knowledge, and to keep her own youth, her health, and her strength, she cani still only perform one job at a time. Il have known a teacher to get up at fivei in the morning to do the family wash-; ing before school, but she did not look! any the better for it. Not all married! workers live within easy distance of a 1 convenient bagwash. Not Forced to Marry.

The feminist writers are inclined to state the case of the married woman as if she were clubbed, carried off, and married against her will, although from observations made this seems to bo very far from the truth. If, however, a woman with ‘'little* natural aptitude and less training” takes upon herself the duties of home-making without attempting to improve herself in that respect, she is indeed a contemptible! creature, but there are extremely few! of her kind. Why are the domestic science talks on the radio so popular? Why do books and magazines on cookery and home-making have such a sale? Is it not because the home-makers are anxious to fit themselves the better for the duties they have imposed upon themselves. It is surely absurd to sayj that a woman will make a better, mother when she has worn herself out by working for someone else. Marriage is, after all, a career like any other; it .demands the same care and. attention) from a woman as she would give to any! other, and she chooses it of her own free will. The mother who poses as a martyr, and who impresses upon herj children that she has “sacrificed her] life” for them, deserves “scornful toler-j ance.” It is the ordinary mother who] takes the sacrifice as all in the day’s 1 work, and who secs that her children have as happy a childhood as she can! give them, and later on, a home ten which their friends are heartily wel-1 conic, whom the children will “call; blessed,” and, thank God, even in this! age of progress the majority of mothers belong to this class.