BY THE WAY.

Star (Christchurch), Volume LXVI, Issue 20238, 23 February 1934, Page 5

BY THE WAY.

Some Collections and Reflections. BY ONE OF THE BOYS. Alice: “ What makes you think your new photographs are so horrid?” Gladys: “ All my girl friends ask for one, my male friends don’t.” Teacher: Now’, Robert, what are you doing—learning something? Robert: No, sir; I’m listening to you. Proprietor: “You come into my restaurant, you order a glass of vater, you drink it, and you calmly valk out! ” Scot: “ What were ye expectin’ me to do, mon? Stagger oot?” Phyl: “ What did your husband think about that expensive new* hat you bought last week?” Flo: “He just raved about it!” “What is an impressionist picture?” asked a country cousin of a town cynic at the art gallery. “ Why, an impressionist picture is one that leaves on your mind the impression that it is the interior of a mustard-pot, until you look at the catalogue, and read that it is a view of Venice, or a lire at sea! ” A young man who had suddenly inherited a iortune decided to learn how ! to carry himself in society. At a ! “ School of Deportment ” a bowing ' Frenchman begged him to enter. “Do | you give lesrons in deportment? ” in- j quired the young man. “ The best, m’sieu! ” gurhed the proprietor. “My' system ees perfect. Two weeks ago a i young man—like you, m’sicu—he take ! only three of my lessons in deport- j ment —and yesterday he was deport- ’ •d I