“INFLUENCED TOO MUCH BY TABOOS.”

Star (Christchurch), Issue 19197, 10 October 1930, Page 8

“INFLUENCED TOO MUCH BY TABOOS.”

HAS MARRIAGE BEEN ASSISTED BY CHURCH? (Special to the “Star.”) LONDON, September 7. A suggestion that the Church ought to institute definite training for marriage was made by Dr H. D. A. Major, Principal of Ripon Hall, at the Modem Churchmen’s Conference at Oxford. “The Church,” he declared, “needs to promote definitely the right kind of marriage, and to prevent, if possible, the wrong kind. “No doubt the Church has tried to do this, but too often in the wrong way. It, has been influenced by taboos too much, and by science too little. Easier Divorce. Dr Major asked what attitude should the Church take up if the State proceeded to render divorce more easy. “I should reply,” he said, “that the Church’s attitude to the State ought to be exactly what I have advocated it should be towards the individual citizen—an attitude of forbearance, persuasion, example, fellowship. “The Church authorities should not threaten to demand Disestablishment because they do not like the State’s marriage and divorce reforms.” Marriage a Sacrament. Dr Douglas Whyte, who for many years has been a member of the Archbishop’s Commission on six relations, spoke on “ Principles of Sexual Conduct.” It remained for the . future generation, he said, to determine whether their young men should rise to the standard which had been expected of women, or whether women should accommodate themselves to the standard which they had expected of men. One or the other was inevitable. “ Love between men and women,” he said, “is properly regarded as a beautiful thing—the most beautiful of life. “ If it be so, then sex is capable of absorption into the spiritual realm; we are relieved of the ultimate dualism between flesh and spirit. “I have not been able to grasp in what other sense marriage may be called a sacrament, but as the true sacrament of love marriage stands unique. “ Rose-Tinted Glasses.” “On the other hand, apart from the spiritual element, sex experience has no sacramental value. “ Mixed marriages between persons of different races or nations involve considerable risk of incompatibility. “ Even within the same nation, great differences of early environment and education do not promise well. “ On the other hand, neither men nor women should seek for similarity. What is wanted is complementariness, so that defects are compensated. “ Whatever advice we offer, it is all but impossible for young men and women to form anything like a dispassionate judgment on a matter where passion both is and ought to be the predominant factor. “ Lovers wear rose-tinted glasses, and the tint is apt to fade in the weather stress of life. “ The result is in many cases unhappy, and in many more cases intolerable marriages. “ There is also another element of uncertainty. Long after a man has reached physical maturity, his mind develops, his opinions alter, his tastes change. “Changes in women are far greater. Hence, divorce is necessary, and it is not forbidden by Christ. Unpromising marriages may turn out almost ideal, promising ones the reverse.”