BY THE WAY.

Star (Christchurch), Issue 19118, 10 July 1930, Page 9

BY THE WAY.

SOME COLLECTIONS AND REFLECTIONS (By One of the Boys.) Some women atone for being married by always being coquettish. A new idea of nothing—A bladeless knife without a handle. A man is not necessarily bad because his wife wants to reform him. Vista: An opening in the landscape through which one can see a hoarding‘ She never knew that the front bumpier bar of her car was detachable until she discovered it by accident. Teacher: “When did William Shakespeare die?" Johnny: “I didn’t even know he was crook.” (A few days later). Teacher: “That boy of yours is very dull. I asked him when Shakespeare died, and he told me he didn’t even know he was ill.” Johnny's father: “Well, you can’t blame the boy. You see, we don’t get the paper very often.” Mary, Mary, quite contrary— How your hem-line grows! It used to swirl above your knees, And now it hides your toes! It won’t hurt but a minute. If you will just sit very quietly in the chair here while I get a good hold on it. One quick jerk and it will be out. You’ll hardly feel it. Brace yourself on the arms while I pull it. One, two, three and it’s out. Now, if you will just be patient while I pull about six more, your eyebrows will be perfectly arched again. « Hints for dining out.—Always fold your serviette if you expect to get ii in your pockety “What is an easy way to learn to skate?” “Strap a pillow on behind.” “But I always fall forward.” “Then wear a derby and let youi ears act as shock absorbers.” m a “Did you hear of Jack stepping in front of the train?” “No. Was he killed?” “No. The train was backing up.”