BY THE WAY.

Star (Christchurch), Issue 18623, 27 November 1928, Page 9

BY THE WAY.

SOME COLLECTIONS AND REFLECTIONS.

(By One of the Boys.) The ton of fruit sent to the King recalls the story of the native king whose coronation was approaching. His dusky loyal subjects all paraded with costly gifts except one man, who had had the brilliant idea of growing a giant banana for his majesty. The king was incensed at this paltry gift and ordered it to be rammed down the donor's throat. The headman was performing this painful office when the native burst out laughing. “ What are you laughing about? said the headman. “ This is no laughing matter.” “Isn’t it?” said the native. But you don’t know that first of all I had an idea of growing a giant pineapple for the king.” X X X A lady from far Madagascar, Fell in love and eloped with a lascar. Her friends said, “ ’Twas naughty, But you see she was forty, So she took whoever would ask her.” “Nothing is better for the skin than a facial mud-pack,” says a beauty specialist. On a wet day almost any lorry driver will oblige. X X X A psychologist remarks that borrowers are never popular. We understand that in many suburbs branches have been formed of the Lawnmower OwnerDrivers’ United Protection Society. “Why does the Englishman cling to the bowler hat?” asks a French journalist. Wind, monsieur, wind. x x x The cricket cable, after recounting the dismal story of Leyland being missed four times, and Geary once, says that “the fielding was indifferent.” Another glimpse of the obvious. Second thoughts, perhaps the cable man used up all his vocabulary when he saw them dropped. I read in “Things Thoughtful” yesterday: “Do not stain to-day’s blue sky with to-morrow’s clouds.” Mr Wooles, please note. x Germany’s latest idea is that she mustn’t pay any more reparations than she can without inconveniencing herself, and that the Allies’ debts to America mustn’t have anything to do with it. Well, all we have to do now is to go out in the garden and eat worms, tear up the Peace Treaty, and apologise for helping America to win the war.