BY THE WAY.

Star (Christchurch), Issue 18011, 23 November 1926, Page 9

BY THE WAY.

SOME REFLECTIONS AND COLLECTION (By One of the Boys). Club Steward (to member of a Worcester Street club) : “ Professor Pe£> has left his umbrella again. I do believe he would leave his head behind if it were loose.” Club Member: “ I dare say you're right. Only yesterday I heard him say that he was going to the Hermitage at Mount Cook for his lungs.” s£ a To Mr Baldwin. “ After his so-called win. Lines are bint, not bfOkin.” Cook has spoken. Talking about Otira excursions:—If I were Premier Coates, you know, T wouldn’t have such a row to hoe. I’d make a name as a brainy bloke By making the women in smokers smoke. k In -London only five men are qualified to be Lord Mayor. In Timaru they count those who're disqualified. s*: ss The butchers won't butch, so the freezers freeze. sc js An Irish doctor who had prescribed a very restricted diet for a patient was horrified to discover that the man, far from adhering to it, was eating and drinking whatever he Chose. “Why don’t you keep to the diet I gave you?” he demanded angrily. “ ’Deed, sor,” replied the imperturbable fellow, “I thought it over and came to the conclusion that there was no good starvin' meself to death for the sake o’ livin’ a few. years longer.”