SPINDRIFT.

Star (Christchurch), Issue 17027, 28 April 1923, Page 8

SPINDRIFT.

Headers are invited te nN In origin** topical paragraph* or versa* for the oolumn. which is a daily laatura of the ‘ Star." Accepted contributions should •® out by the writer* and forwarded to the Editor, who will remit the amount* payable.

A friend of mine who wag worlypg At a polling booth in connection with the municipal elections tells m« that during the day he was called upon to answer the following questions:— How many do I have to vote for for Mayor ? Can I vote for anyone whose name is not on this list? Do you know which of these gentlemen are professing Christians? Can I hare my paper buck please? I gave my sixteenth vote to Mr Anderson and I want to make sure that I marked the right Mr Anderson, as 1 see there are two. One man asked for a ticket on the favourite, and was quite annoyed when the officials would not take his money. When pretty girls are passing by And give to me the gladsome eye, I know just what I ought te do, I know that I have got my cue I® frown and say: “Dear me, how bold !” But if the truth must now he told. I feel quite tickled. When some smart fellow who has been The owner of a limousine, W T ho’s lived in style and cut a dash Comes suddenly a frightful smash, I ought to sympathise a bit, Instead of which I must admit I feel quite tickled. When I at work have got to stay While others have a holiday. And when their picnic parties get Caught in a storm and come home wet, I ought to griev© at their downfall; But still it’s human after all To feel quite tickled. It is rumoured that a lot of hus bands in Australia are attending Mr Hickson’s meeting in the hope that he might be able to cure them of their wives’ complaints The cry of the hour: “ Hamlet, Hamlet, where wilt thou be?” What iaf this thing as days fly by That fills with tears the suffering eye. And mokes me early darkly sigh? The frewt! What is it keeps me in my bed, And shivering hath oft me led Into the cold, cold world for bread? The frost! What is it “painte upon the pane,” And sends me stamping might and main A down that whitened Burwood lane? The frost! What is this thing that blues my hand And ravages this bitter land, And draw's my features with its brand? The f reel! Yea, this it is that makes me late, That dogs my footsteps like grim Fate, That fills my heart with suffering hate —The frost! This is the thing that makes me sigh ; Mine not to dodge or reason why. But grin and bear as- days go by— The frost! “ Dunedin under water.” Well, well. They only need the whisky and the lemon now to warm their hearts. SOME VERSES FROM A BARRACK - BR’S RUBAIYAT. Awake ! for Winter winds have put to flight From off our fields, the fools in flannels w'hite ! Has driven tennis fan* from off their courts. And surfers far from roaring breakers sight. Come, come on up, what boots it to repine. Over the wastes of months of summertime? May be next week ’twill rain, but still What matters? for last Saturday was fine. With me along a strip of herbage strown. That .just divides the rough stuff from the sown, Where name of Blunt and Worker is forgot. And peace to Geoffrey on his tennis throne. There, clad in overcoat, I made my bow, A good old trusty pair of kings, and Beside me yelling at the surging press. Ah. football fans in Paradise are now. What if a few on past defeat* are sore. Some brag of victories and yell for more. Oome, take your stand and all together shout And listen, brother, hear the answering FACTS AND FIGURES FOR 1923. It is worth noting that the number of days in the year 1923 is divisible by Easter this year tell on a Sunday. This was also the case last year. To obtain the number of minutes in 1923 a good recipe is to mutiply 365 (the number of clays) by 24 (the numbei of hours in a day) and then multiply the number by 60 (the number of minutes in an hour). Tile answer will be near enough for practical purpose*, A curious feature of 1923 is that the | figures twisted round read 3291. I It is interesting to note that the Maori names for the month* are slightly different from our own. For instance, with them, “May” become* “ Mai ’ and April become* “ Aperere.* The j Chinese term* differ even more. To qualify a* centenarians this year j candidates must have been born not j later than 1823. *•* A suburban draper announce*: “OCR ( GENUINE SALE NOW ON.” What j was the last one like? ** # Dancing is now recommended in | school* as an aid to health. From high jinks to hygienics is but a step. A speaker at a returned soldiers’ gathering said: “l’t is no use anyone attempting tomato growing or poultry raising unless he has a bent that way.” Apparently those who are not bent the right way go broke. Father to his six-year-old son: “ Come on. son. we won’t wait for the tram, but we will walk home across the Park.” Boy: “ No, father, don’t. I am afraid to go that way.” Father: “ Afraid! Why it is only five o’clock and not dark. Fancy a boy six years old being afraid. What are you scared of.” Boy: “There’s a bogey there daddy.” Father: “Don’t be sillv. there is no such thing.” Boy: “Yes - there is daddy. T heard two men with j golf sticks in there vesterday after- j noon say that they had beaten bogev.” 6INBAD.