HE TOOK SOMETHING.

Star (Christchurch), Issue 6138, 26 March 1898, Page 4

HE TOOK SOMETHING.

The other morning, as a belated member; of the Owl Club was steering home aii' three o'clock, he passed a house where re-' sided a well-known physician. The vesti-' bule of his residence was open, and on its' side, in ordsr that he might malfe inquiries* from anyone who disturbed hiui, thej doctor had placed the mouth of a -speaking! tube, underneath which was the inscription, " Whistle for Dr Potts." Not wishing to be disobliging about bo* small a matter, the Owl stumbled up th* steps, and steadying himself against tha wall, blew into the pipe with all the strength of his lungs.

Tho physician, who was awakened by the resultant shiill whistle near his head, arose and groped his way to the tube and shouted, "Well?" *

"Glad to know you're well," waa tha reply : "* but, being a doctor, I" s'pose you 1 can keep well at cost price, can't you ?" ' ."What do you want?" Baid the man ofi pills, not caring to joke in the airy nothing of his nightshirt. " Well," said the party at the other end of the tube, after a few moments' meditation. "Oh, by the way, are you young, Potts or old Potts ?" ' j "I am Dr Potts— there is no young PottS." * :

" JST ot dead, I hope ?" " There never was any — I have no son." t "Then you are young Potts and old Potts, too, Dear, dear, how singular!" >. "What do you wantP" snapped the' doctor. * "

**Do you know old Mrs Peavine, who lives in the next street?" " Yos. Is she ill P What's the matter ? *'■ "Do you know -her nephew- too — Bill Briggs?"

"Yes. Well?"

_ "Well, he went out shooting this morning, and— "

"And he Jiad an accident? Stop a minute, and I'll be down." " No, he's all right ; but he made a good P a £. I thought you might like to hear And the joker hung on to the mouth- 1 piece, aad laughed like a hyona. "I say," camo down from tho exasperated M.D., " that's a jolly good joke, my friend. Won't you take something ?" "WhatP" said the surprised humorist;, pausing for breath. "Why, take something. Take this." ■and before the disgusted funny matt could withdraw his mouth, a hastily compounded mixture of ink, ipecacuanha, aud asafoefcida squirted from the pipe, and deluged him from head to foot, about a pint monopolising his shirt-front aud collar.

And while he danced frantically about, sponging himself with hiß handkerchief, and raging liko a pirate in the lnst aot, he could hear a voice from above sweetly murmur :— "Have some more? No? Well, good night. Come again soon, you funny dog, you."