LITERATURE.

Star (Christchurch), Issue 3894, 11 October 1880, Page 4

LITERATURE.

OUR LODGERS

Wo wero fired with new projects — we wero desperate in our last extremity. We had received notice to quit extremely comfortable furnished apartments ; and we wero, moreover, tho fortunate recipients of a legacy of £300 from a maiden aunt. Why not, we asked, invariably looking at the best Bido of things with the unreason of our sex, take a fair-sized house in a promising neighbourhood, and let lodgings ? Tho project, to be sure, had its diead vantages — what new scheme has not ? — and then, on the other hand, it looked exceedingly promising, especially on paper, with eeven 'nice rooms dotted out as bringing fn so much money. We were tired of being the victims, the hapless flies caught in the web« of sharp and experienced lodginghouse people so perfectly drilled in every " knowing " d -dgi % . Wo rebelled against those genteel cadgers, who stole our butter, tea, and sugar ; who had doubie key 3 to all the cupbounis and drawers, and who entered our rooms and read our letters, and smudged our photographic albums, and thumped nigger melodies on our pretty cottage piano. Wliynot convert ourselves into apidera and catch-flies too ? Why not have a i:eat maid^ servant — tbe handy Irish girl immortalised by Dion Boucicault and other celebrated authors, ready to work for a kind word and no wages, and find ourselves the fortunato possessors of a well- furnished house and lodgers ? Every one, more or less, approved the notion, except the old nurse of Millicent, who spoke her mind with more candour than politeness. " Ifc won't suit neither of you," this uncompromising old woman declared, speaking with tho experience of seventy years ; " you've both the misfortune to be ladies by birth and education, and you now both belorg to what I've heard called the shabby genteel. I tell you you'll both 'aye to wait on them lodgers, that is, if you get 'em ; and you'll only be a kind of upper servants yerselves." We both warmly repudiated the notion, and endeavoured to laugh th.3 excellent Mrs Hyssop to scorn. " How very absurd !" we both exclaimed ; " there's tho servant, of course, to do all that, or else what will be the good of her?" Nurse shook her head. "A 6g for the servant ; you'll 'aye to work yeraelves. Take my advice, both of you — put your three 'undred pounds out on a good mortgage, and keep on in furnished aparfcmente. Never mind if they do take a nob of your sugar, or a sprinkle of tea, or play tho pianner when you're out. Lodgers will come and spoil your place and go off wiihout payin' a farthing, and you'll buy cheap furniture that'll fall to pieces ; and you'll both be taken in and lose your money, besides 'aving to work like niggers." Nevertheless we turned a deaf oar to this household Cassandra. Fate blinded our eyes and deafened our cars, and urged us t o go stumbling onward to our doom. We scoured every neighbourhood in the desire to find a suitable residence. We spent a small fortune on omnibuses, trains, and occasionally, when it rained, cabs. At last we found an agreeable and commodious house at Hazelmero. Nothing could exceed the civility of the local house-agent and landlord. They politely asked for references, praised the neighbourhood, said the air was equal, if not superior, to that of Brighton, declared the taxes were merely nominal, offered to improve both front and back gardens, and even pledged themselves willing to meet our -views to the extent of adding handsome folding- doors and a new kitchen dresser ; these gonerous concessions on the part of utter strangers quite overcame us ; we positively blushed with gratitudo, as we rang tho dining-room bells and found them quite melodious. " Won't it be nico when Sarah, or whatever her namo is, comes in to answer the bells ?" we said, in playful foolishness and beautiful belief in the eternal fitness of things, as we glanced admiringly through tho fine bay-window down the long wide road. With the conviction that we wero putting the poor man to unheard-of trouble and expense over the folding-doors and dresßer, we murmured our thanks and withdrew; references were exchanged, and all ended satisfactorily ; we began took down the inviting columns of daily papers, over our breakfast, for bargains in furniture — yes, and lodgers ; we have always been given to taking a too cheerful view of things, like the worthy Mr Briggs, spite of our past experiences, which should have rendered us ultrapossimists ; still hope springs eternal in the human breast, and we wero madly arxious to take a house. Of course we were dreadfully "green;" wo forgot to analyse the poor's rate, queen's taxes, inhabited house duty, &c, and all the other minutiro of expenditure ; our friends told us we should be mischievous if we had no worries, and very good-naturedly left us to ourselves, kindly suggesting that we should be careful, or a sad awakening might be ours; wo ought to reflect well, and do nothing rashly, &c. ; we blbo listened patiently to a graphic account of their experiences ; we resolved to be very prudent, and lay out but little money aO first, in order to see how the pluco let ; wo therefore introduced ourselves to the manager of a furnishing company, who snubbed us painfully when he saw we were doing it "on tho cheap." Warning us that his time was valuable, and that wo must make up our minds " sharp," ho led us through acres of rooms, and eventually sold us furniture to the extent of a hundred pounds ; our heads ached over the inspection of tho various styles of fenders, beds, tables, chairs, and saucepans. " Never mind," we said, " with the pathetic trust of our Christian natures, and with the exaltation of two excelsiors advancing to glory, " we shall get it all back again out of the lodgers." And yet our past experience proved that we never did, through some strange fatality, ever get a single

farthing back from any expended sums ; we always considered ourselves regular failures (I say " we," because we look upon ourselves as " one," and intend to sink or swim together) ; we had spent considerable Bums in various artistic ventures, with the usual fatal results, and yet we were bold enough to attempt another of a more practical kind, yet still a venture.

" Here, at any rate, is something for our money at last," Milhcont is saying to me, pointing to tho furniture ; "it isn't like paying money away to poople and never seeing it again ; here are good solid chairs and tables, nr;d wo are now in a fair way to make money." Millicont is tho elder, and I naturally look up to her for guidance. She is a Bplendid creature, whom I love as a being from another sphere. Married for her money to an unscrupulous man, who spent nearly every penny of it, and was then forced to leave England to escape from his creditors, Millicent Fane and her three children came abont seven years ugo to live with her only surviving relative, an uncle. Two of these children died, and I was engaged as governess to the remaining one. The uncle suggested that the child should be sent to school, at the same tinio informing us wo should have to " clear out ;" ho was sick of housekeeping. I declined to leave Millicent, and we together faced the world, living till now in furnished apartments, on what was the wreck of her once magnificent fortune. A month elapsed ere we were at all settled in our now homo, or had time to think of lodgers. Wo had been paying 20s a week for our furnished apartments, and good attendance, when wo were fired with the idea to take a homo ; and we now found ourselves weighted with the responsibility of rent, taxes, ga9, and servant, in all amounting to about £120 a year. " Never mind," we eaid again, radiant and cheerful, though tho charwoman, who had come to Bcrub the rooms, had put her broom through a large pane of glass, and by upsetting her pail wo found the ceiling Bpoilt, and water dripping on our heads, there are lodgers to look forward to." Our servant also gave us some uneasiness. We found she had a violent antipathy to cold meat, liver and bacon, fish, boiled rice, and thor cheap but nutritious articles of diet. Bhe was always talking of pudding. A servant with pudding on the brain, and not in the stomach is an aflliction at the best of times.

(To be- continued.)