BEFORE THE COURT.

Star (Christchurch), Issue 2424, 29 December 1875, Page 4

BEFORE THE COURT.

He was a stogy-looking man, one oy< ■ Swelled shut, one finger badly bitten, coal torn down tho back, hat gone, and his gooc •ye having ft wild look. Ho was a farmer and he had come in with some produce, sold it for cash down, and sold his cash for whisky " Found in an alley, ugly drunk," said th< Court. "Well, I feel mean enough about it," replied the prisoner. " Wanted to have a good time, eh P" » Yes." « And I guess you had one ! You iool grarty, you do, Mr Bamboo ! You, look niot to go home to your wife and children," 1 *?l made a fool of myself." " And I am glad to hear you own the oorn, Ton were as ugly m a Malay when the polio* brought you in \ but as you are all banged op. repentant; and £8 out of pooket, I'm going to let you go homo." "Much obliged,'' „ " Is your wile an innooent*minded woman, Mr Ramb— that is, doea she always believe everything you say P" " Yes, sir, most always." "Well, now, when you reach home you teU her that you were down to the ferry dooi where the little steamers canter back and forth over the foaming billows, when four tugs and a propeller ran into your bows and almost stove you to pieces." *Ye»,»srj I will." ♦<An4sbVU believe it P» "She will." f Well, go out i . put beef on jour eye, salve on your finger, run your face for a hat, and when you come to town again see if you can't keep from making a fool of yourself." " You needn't have no trial over me," said William Palmer, as he toed the mark." , " You want to plead guilty, ehP" : "Yes, sir. Send me right up." " I'll send you up, of course, but hasn't , the pure air of liberty any oharms for you. Hadn't you rather ride on the ferry-boAts, And the women faint away when their hats blow off. than go up to the retreat and make enslrsr , "Mb, sir. I'm tired out, hungry, strapped md discouraged." " Will sixty days do you P" "Idunno.* 11 Well^ say four months P" ' " I'd rather you'd make it six, I want to sit down and think and get fat and regain my V health. I'm shattered to pieoeß." „. "Six it is, Mr Palmer, and if I could send I you for sixty years I'd do that. I see you haven't got any stamina of oharaoter. You are an old log, content to float with the our. rent When you sit down you want., some one to rig e> derrick and hoist you up so as to save exertion. I'll send word up by the driver, and I'll bet my farm against a hat that you'll step around high while your sen* tence lasts." ..-.„. in the course of his discourse on crime before the Social Science Congress at Brigh« tonJEiord Aberdare mentioned that the crime df Wales in proportion to the population is but half that of England. This statement will help to remove from some minds a prejudice they have been imbued with in the nursery thftt-- '' Taffy was a Welshman, Taffy was a thief." This slanderous nursery rhyme should be cMMseUed or rewritten now that Lord Aber- #»» has vindicates his countrymen from the aspersion it implies, He has demonstrated Ijy figures that Taffy is not half suoh a thief »J John Bull. ■ - Wbbtoh'b Wizaed Oil an?) Magic Pills have cured more wonderful oases of Rheumatism, Gout, Neuralgia, Aohes, Pains, Swellings, Caked Breasts, Burns, Soalde, and Salkßheum upon the human frame, than all the pretended remedies have since the world began. These Great American Medioines are oompoied of vegetable oils, healing gums, roots and herbs j and aotlikea charm upon pain and inflammation. Wholesale agents— Kempthorne, Prosser and Co., Dunedin. Prioe—Half-a-Orown.— [Abvx.]