Varicties.

Star (Christchurch), Issue 70, 4 August 1868, Page 3

Varieties.

X'Tho other day. at tho Lecd's Pollco Court, a man having all tho appearance of one of Erin's ftons, was charged with being drunk and disorderly, and asserting ho was a lonian. Tho Uonch wore about to inlllct a vory severe punishment, determining, thoy sahi, to mnko an example of those Irishmen who— whon thoy wero Interrupted by a woman who declared "and sure, yer honour, hu's not ail 'Irishman at all at all : ho'ti a Dubllti man.*' Tho sontenco was accordingly inlilwHtod to Bovon days'- Imprißonment, Many a blunder U made by r<*porloi*«, which cau»i) tlioso whose woids are misrepresented to gnanh lhcir teeth with agony. "Partner In the works " becomes " pauper in tho workhouse." •• Aticndcrs at olubtt in the West End," mentioned in a speech of Mr Bright's, appeals lhe next morning as •• vendors of gloves," " What do the Italians want?" crlod ono Impassioned orator j "they want io bo a nation." ." What do tho Italians want ?" said tho report next morning ; " ihoy want to bo in Aula," "Died from recent hemorrhage," tho verdict returned by .a jury on the body of a woman, ia transformed Into, " Died from iior reoont 'marriage j" evidently iho blunder of somo mlsunthroplc bachelor reporter,

I havo como across a judicial anecdote, thd •teeno of which lies in Germany, and it illuetratea very ludicrously tbo matter-of-fact and methodical nature of the Teutonic mind, as well as its Bovero adherence to logic. A complnfnt was made to a magistrate that a blow had been given in tho courso of nn altercation, but the witness who wns relied on to prove the nssnult could only say that he heard tho blow given, ns bo was at the time in a certain inn noar which the occurrcnco had taken place. The defendant, who denied giving the blow, urged that it was impossible, oren if it had been given, that the witness could have heard It from where ho was.' Tho magistrate resolved to try tho point liy actual experiment, and proceeded to tho Inn, whllo an oflicer of iho court accompanied tho complainant to the precise spot whvro lhe quarrel had occurred, and thero and then gave him a good sound whack. Tho magistrate, on resuming his sent in court, said ho hud heard the blow perfectly well from insMo the Inn, and the defendant must pny a doublo fine— ono for tbe original blow, thfOthur for the experimental and official thump.